It All Started With A Fever, Part 22

The Chronic Phase: Trying to Get Some Traction

The Social Worker at Primary Children’s Hospital told us that writing in a journal can be therapeutic. Even more, perhaps sharing our journey these past few weeks may help other families with children who suffer from this rare, devastating syndrome (F.I.R.E.S. = Febrile Infection-Related Epileptic Syndrome) or other chronic conditions.

Rehab Team, Day #9 (Saturday, September 16th)

79 days since onset.

7:00 PM: Drew had a pretty decent day riding the bicycle and shooting a small basketball for physical therapy. He sorted his clean laundry and folded his clothes with occupational therapy. He practiced memory and word-recognition games with speech therapy. Then in the afternoon, Drew was able to watch a little bit of the BYU versus Wisconsin football game before falling asleep (the game was ugly anyway) for a 90-minute nap.

He had a really good evening playing cards (War and Go Fish) with his family, especially once they brought him an eye patch. We were noticing the last several days that as Drew would try to read or look at his phone, he would close his left eye and look through his right eye. As the therapists would work with him, he would constantly say that his right eye was clear and worked well, but the left eye seemed blurry and was not lining up with the right eye. As we put the patch over his left eye, he had a much easier time looking at his cards and playing the games tonight. There are plans for an Opthamology consult later in the week.

Playing cards with the new eye patch. He said it helped a lot.

9:30 PM: Drew starts getting ready for bed by 8:30 most nights because he gets a bunch of seizure medicines at about 8:15, and when they start to kick in 20 to 30 minutes later, he pretty much falls asleep even if he is in the middle of playing cards. So we try to get teeth brushed and ready for bed just after his medicines are given.

Drew had been in bed and falling asleep as the nurses were doing vital signs and performing their shift assessment tonight, but they had to re-dress the bandage covering the bedsore on his tailbone. As he seemed to already be asleep, the nurse’s aide helped roll Drew onto his side and held him there while the nurse worked on the bandage. However, Drew woke up and flew into a rage.

“Will you stop bullying me?” Drew yelled at the nurse’s aide who was helping to roll him. He pushed hard against the bed rail and fought with the nurses to roll away from them.

”Why are you doing this to me?” He said as he glared at the aide.

The nurse said, “Drew, we need to change your bandage on your back — can you roll over for me?”

”Leave me alone,” Drew yelled as he took a swing at the nurse and tried to hit her. He then tried to punch the nurse’s aide in front of him.

Dawn and I then jumped up and went over to the side of Drew’s bed. His mother tried to calm him down and remind him where he was while I held his hands to stop him swinging at the nurses. It took all of us working together to finally help him to relax and turn for the nurses. Unfortunately, his bed sore has “stalled” according to the Wound Nurse, and we are trying some different bandages and a medicine called Meta-honey to see if it can help the wound to heal. The bed sore is about the size of a small matchbox and goes about halfway to the bone, which is better than it was in the ICU, but hasn’t changed for a couple of weeks now.

This is the third Saturday night in a row that I was able to go home and sleep in my bed. Drew’s older sister has volunteered to come up from school on the weekends and stay with Drew on Saturday nights so that I can go home and get some sleep and get to all of my church meetings more easily on Sunday mornings.

Rehab Team, Day #10 (Sunday, Septemer 17th)

80 days since onset.

4:10 AM: The bed alarm went off as Drew tried to climb out of bed. However, as soon as his sister stood up, he remembered he was in the hospital and stopped, and then he went back to sleep for a while.

11:30 AM: He had a good breakfast and got dressed once his mother arrived at the hospital. He fell asleep just before church was to start at 10:30, so they missed the meeting. But the church leaders came around after the meeting and offered the sacrament in Drew’s room. The leaders blessed the sacramental emblems and then gave them to Drew, his mother, and his sister.

Later when I arrived at the hospital, Drew said, “Hey, Dad! Guess what?”

“What?”

“When they blessed the sacrament in my room, they said to ‘bless the bread and this piece of cheese….” He paused for a moment to look at me and see if I understood.

“No they didn’t, Drew,” his mother corrected.

He seemed serious and intense, but then the corners of his mouth slowly turned upward and Drew started chuckling.

She explained to me that they do have to give him a piece of cheese instead of bread because of his Ketogenic diet, but they didn’t change the words of the prayer. Sometimes it is hard to tell if Drew is joking or not, but once he started giggling at his joke, we all started laughing.

5:30 PM: Drew fell asleep not long after I got to the hospital. He typically has a rest break in the morning and another one in the afternoon, not necessarily to sleep, but just to give his healing brain a rest from any stimulation. We turn the lights out and keep the room quiet, so he usually falls asleep anyway, but we were told to limit his naps to 60-minutes, if possible.

This afternoon, we started to wake him up from his nap so that he could visit with some family and cousins who had come up to the hospital. However, he was struggling to wake up. We try tickling him, pinching his legs (softly), and sometimes even ice packs. He woke up enough to get up to his wheelchair, but then fell back asleep while we moved to the lobby.

Because his room is relatively small, and to minimize noise and overstimulation, the doctors had limited Drew to no more than 2 visitors at a time in his room. So today, we thought we would go down to the lobby where there was more room for everyone. There would still be a lot of noise, but it wouldn’t be as confined.

Once in the lobby, we woke him up again, and then he was able to visit with some of his cousins he hadn’t seen since before he got sick. After a few minutes, he recognized them and gave them hugs. Even though he kept mixing up their names, he actually remembered them and had a nice visit. As he gets tired or over-stimulated, he will perseverate or forget words, and he has a harder time hearing and understanding what is said to him. We try to speak loudly and stand in front of him when we talk to him, and that helps him to understand. His grandparents and his aunt and uncle were also there. A short time later, three of his friends from school came and they visited quite a while with Drew before and after dinner.

Rehab Team, Day #11 (Monday, September 18th)

81 days since onset.

1:30 AM: I awoke to the sound of Drew’s bed alarm. I opened my eyes and saw Drew’s legs hanging over the bed rail.

”Drew, stop,” I yelled. “Where are you going?” I jumped up and ran over to stop him from getting out of bed. The nurse ran into the room as I grabbed Drew’s legs and pushed them back over the rail.

”Dad, I need to get up and brush my teeth,” Drew said, and then he tried to squirm out of my grip and swing his legs again.

”No, Drew,” I said. “It’s the middle of the night still.”

”We’ll brush your teeth in the morning,” the nurse said as she worked to reset the bed alarm.

”Where’s my phone?” Drew asked. I handed his phone to him. He pushed the button to illuminate the screen, and then he squinted and read the time. “One-thirty,” he read aloud.

”Yes,” I said. “In the morning. You need to go back to sleep until 7:30.”

”OK,” he said as he closed his eyes and pulled his blanket up to his chin. It took a few more minutes, but he finally drifted back to sleep. Once I was sure he was out, I slowly retreated to the fold-out couch and laid back down.

4:30 AM: He woke up again, but this time he didn’t yell or try to get out of bed. I could hear him fidgeting in the bed, so I opened my eyes and saw that he had grabbed the bedrail with both hands and had pulled himself up so that he could peek over the padded bedrail.

I didn’t say anything, but I waved at him. He waved back.

”It’s still the middle of the night, Drew. You need to get some more sleep.” Without a word, he rolled back into the bed and closed his eyes. I watched for several minutes to make sure he wasn’t playing possum and attempting another bed exit, but I could hear his snoring start back up again and I knew he was asleep.

7:30 AM: Drew woke up two more times in the night, but once was when the nurses emptied his bladder at 6:00 AM, so it wasn’t entirely his fault. At least he was more easily oriented to remember he was in the hospital and he was able to more quickly fall back asleep.

I had started waking Drew up again so that he can get out of bed and up to his chair for breakfast. He was starting to rouse when the nurses entered the room. The night nurse and day nurse finish up their shift-change report in the room beside the patient’s bed.

As she finished up her report, the night nurse leaned closer to the bed and said, “Drew, I’m going home now.”

“What?” Drew has half-asleep still, and nearly automatically raised both his arms and said, “Well, alright then. Come give me a hug.”

“Well, OK,” the nurse said.

As she leaned forward and Drew wrapped his arms around her shoulders, she said, “Hey, Buddy, you need to brush your teeth — your breath stinks.”

Without missing a beat, Drew responded, “Well, so does yours.” Drew didn’t laugh, but the rest of us did.

8:00 AM: Once Drew was awake and transferred into his chair, I pulled his bedside tray closer and helped put the straw in his breakfast smoothie.

“Dad, I’m sick of shakes.”

”I’m sorry, bud,” I said. “This is all you can have right now. We’ll talk to the doctors later today and see if we can change it.”

“Fine,” he said. However, I encouraged and cued him for the next 20 minutes and he reluctantly took a few swallows. Finally, he pushed the cup away and said, “No, I don’t want any more.”

”Fine,” I said. “I don’t blame you.”

I took the unfinished smoothie back out to the nurses’ station. The nurses have to calculate how many calories he ate, and then they re-start his tube feeds between therapy sessions so that he can still get his nutrition and recommended calorie intake.

4:30 PM: I got off of work a little early, and it is a good thing I did because the Neurology attending doctor came to discuss Drew’s diet and other concerns with us. After much discussion, the Neurology Team had agreed that because his wounds are not healing and he is already getting sick of the diet, they are going to start weaning him off of the diet (just like any medicine, they have to gradually decrease it). The goal is to have him off of the diet before he leaves the hospital, and in a way, it will be nice to have him supervised for any possible increase in his seizures as they wean him off the diet and they can adjust stuff here if they need to. No seizures today, and he had a 2-hour nap through lunch, so he did really well in therapy this afternoon. He rode the bicycle outside again this afternoon, and he played several games with OT.

The Neuro doctor said that with the FIRES kids, they will have some seizures when they go home, but they typically don’t go back into status epilepticus (the non-stop seizures) once they enter the chronic stage. As we adjust his medicines they can go slow and make sure the seizures stay under control now. The rehab doctors were saying that even with the 4.5 to 1 ratio, he is barely staying in ketosis, and with his slow-healing wounds, it only makes sense to wean the diet first instead of waiting 2 to 6 months like they normally would. With that decision, they will change his ratio to 4:1 for this week, 3:1 next week, 2:1 the following week, and then finally have him on a normal diet for about a week or so before he goes home. Hopefully that will also allow time for his bedsore and tracheostomy wound to heal before he leaves the hospital.

Getting encouragement from mom. Crawling hurts his wrists, arms, and neck.

Rehab Team, Day #12 (Tuesday, September 19th)

82 days since onset.

9:30 AM: Drew had a better night and only woke up twice, but unfortunately, he had a really hard time waking up for breakfast. Before I left for work, he was also having a hard time staying awake for his PT and OT sessions. In fact, he started falling asleep while putting on his socks, and then again later, he fell asleep while kneeling and working on his balance. I had to leave for work, but Dawn said they barely got him into the wheelchair and returned to his room, and because he was so sleepy, they reclined the wheelchair and let him sleep there until lunch arrived at 11:00.

9:45 PM: I returned a little later tonight after finishing my church meetings and found Drew asleep in bed and Dawn sitting on the couch crying. I held her for a while and let her cry. She finally explained that Drew had a better afternoon and evening, but she was sad after Drew had a visit from his best friend and girlfriend. Drew was asking his best friend all sorts of questions about school and classes, because they were supposed to essentially have the same schedule this semester. As they talked, Dawn said she could tell that Drew was feeling left behind and missing school, and after they left, he was really wanting to get out of the hospital and be back with his friends at school.

”Why did this have to happen?” She asked me. “This isn’t the way his Senior year was supposed to go.”

”I don’t know,” I said. “But at least we still have Drew with us.”

Rehab Team, Day #13 (Wednesday, September 20th)

83 days since onset.

8:00 AM: “Good morning, Drew,” the Nurse Tech said. “Time for your breakfast.”

Drew groggily opened his eyes and looked at the Tech. “Don’t tell me it’s another smoothie,” he said.

“Ok,” the Tech said. “I won’t.”

After a moment, Drew asked, “So, is it another smoothie?”

The Tech smiled. “You’ll have to ask your nurse.”

His nurse walked into the room holding Drew’s breakfast.

Drew couldn’t see what she was holding, so he asked, “Is it another smoothie?”

The nurse, unaware of the previous conversation, shook her head and said, “Yes.”

“Ugh!” Drew said as he closed his eyes and shook his head. “At least I hope it is strawberry.”

As she read the writing on the lid, she smiled and said, “Looks like we at least got that part right — it’s strawberry.”

“Ok, then,” Drew said as he started moving his legs towards the edge of the bed. “I’ll get up. But I can’t believe its another smoothie.”

10:00 AM: Drew struggled to stay awake all through breakfast and his morning therapy sessions. Today he started falling asleep while putting on his socks, and he was barely staying awake while shooting baskets and walking to his room with physical therapy. He had a very hard time just standing up straight, and he leaned heavily on the walker as he walked, nearly falling multiple times if not for the physical therapist pushing and pulling on him to keep him upright. Every step we had to cue him for safety, balance, and direction to his room. When he finally made it to his room, Drew laid down on his bed and immediately fell asleep, which was too bad because he was scheduled for a visit this morning from the Copper Hills High School Principal, Mr. Quarnberg, and Drew’s Counselor, Mrs. Walters. Dawn and I visited with them as Drew slept. They reviewed Drew’s progress towards graduation and allayed our fears about him missing so much school. They assured us that they will work with the hospital Education Specialist to track his work while he is here, and then once he returns home, we will work with the school and his doctors on his gradual return to school. As a very nice gesture, they brought him a school blanket, and encouraged him that lots of people and peers are praying and hoping for his recovery and return.

Drew showing some school spirit.

8:00 PM: Better afternoon, but little progress. Drew had a 90-minute nap through lunchtime and missed lunch, and then after his afternoon therapy sessions, he fell asleep again and missed Music Therapy.  The one bright spot was his evening shower. He finally seemed alert and awake, and he walked with the walker and a lot of assist down to the shower room at the far end of the unit. He tried to do as much of his shower as possible, although with his tracheostomy still open, I had to sit and keep the bandage covered and dry as much as possible.

Rehab Team, Day #14 (Thursday, September 21st)

84 days since onset.

8:30 AM: Instead of hollering my name the last couple of nights when he wakes up, he will lift his head up and look for me on the couch on the opposite side of the room. Or he will grasp the bedrails with both hands and pull himself up to look for me. I still wake up when I hear him moving in bed, so I wave at him to let him know I see him, and then he waves back. I haven’t had to remind him as much that he is in the hospital, but I do have to remind him that it is still the middle of the night and he needs to go back to sleep. The last several nights we were relying on Trazadone to help him stay asleep, but we finally realized that in combination with all of his other seizure medicines, the minimal dose of the sleeping medicine was amplified by the sedating effects of the rest of his medicine, so he was struggling to wake up in the morning, and struggling even more to stay awake the last few days. So we discussed with the doctors, and last night was the first night without any sleeping medicines and it seemed to make a big difference.

Finally a day where we felt like we weren’t just spinning our wheels. He practiced getting dressed with OT and he put his socks on nearly independently. With physical therapy, he walked all the way to the Rehab Gym with a walker (still lots of assistance and verbal cues). Once in the gym, he played Uno with the therapist and his mother while he practiced unsupported sitting, reaching, and holding his cards. In the afternoon, he went for another bicycle ride with physical therapy, along with more practice walking. Finally with Speech Therapy he played memory games with cards and worked on word-finding as he still struggles to remember names of items, or he calls them the wrong word (which is similar to his very first symptoms of being sick, before the seizures even started).

He finished the day with a visit from his brother, Alex, and his brother’s friend. They played WAR, and even though he lost the card game, he was actually somewhat civil in defeat and not so competitive for a change. While his brother was here, we also walked to the end of the hallway and back, touched the ceiling, and had him stand next to his brother to see how tall he was in comparison. The only problem is that Drew kept trying to run and nearly lost his balance multiple times. He is still extremely impulsive and very much lacks any safety awareness. Finally a good day all the way around with therapy, rest, and a little more improvement.

Working on standing balance, coordination, and strength.

Rehab Team, Day #15 (Friday, September 22nd)

85 days since onset.

3:30 PM: I returned to the hospital from work to find Drew in his room working with Speech Therapy, and he hollered, “I don’t like your freakin’ beard or your freakin’ moustache.”

Dawn had stepped into the hallway to visit with one of our neighbors, so Drew had been alone in his room working unsupervised, and he was really acting up today.

“I think you should cut it all off, your freakin’ beard,” Drew said again.

The poor speech therapist was trying hard to redirect Drew to the task they were working on at hand, which was following verbal directions to draw a picture, but Drew was struggling to focus.

“Drew, Drew,” I said as I stuck my face right in front of his, and with our noses nearly touching, I said, “You need to be nice. Stop being so rude.”

”It’s his beard,” Drew said matter-of-factly.

”It’s OK,” the Speech Therapist said. “Drew, let’s try something different.” He then proceeded to pull out the picture cards.

As good as Drew’s day was yesterday, and even with a decent night sleep, he seems to have taken a step backward as far as his behaviors and cognition. He has said lots of rude things to the staff today and isn’t listening when they ask him to help do things, like roll on his side. Fortunately, the nurses and therapists know this is part of the process, but these behaviors can sure try our patience.

4:30 PM: The eye doctor just finished examining Drew. He is from the Opthamology Neurology Team and also video recorded Drew’s eye movements to add to his chart. Essentially, the doctor said there is not much we can do right now to fix his eyes but simply to continue wearing a patch over one eye. His eyes both seem to do well individually, but they are not coordinated together with their movement or focus. The doctor said the way to fix it is to address whatever is causing the vision problems, and at this point, Drew’s vision problems could be due to his brain illness, his prolonged seizures, or three of his seizure medications. Unfortunately, it is too early to say for sure, so in the meantime, wear an eye patch and then we will return to the clinic a few weeks after we leave the hospital.

8:30 PM: “Why are you nurses always reporting what I say?” Drew’s continues to be rude and defiant to the nurses. Not sure if it is official, but in a way, it seems like Drew’s brain is healing similarly to his body. After being so sick and in a come for so long, he needs to re-learn how to roll and sit up and stand and eventually walk and run. In a way, it seems his behaviors and cognition likewise have to progress again through the different stages and phases of growing up. For the past couple of days, he is acting a lot like he is in 4th or 5th grade again. Hopefully this will be a short phase and he will continue to progress to more age-appropriate behaviors, but he may or may not — we just don’t know how much lasting damage was caused by his illness and seizures.

He walked to the shower room again with a walker, assistance, and lots of verbal cues. After, he put a small puzzle together with his sister. It is interesting to note that he still has not regained normal sensation throughout his body. As we were transferring onto the shower bench tonight, he scraped his arm on the doorway pretty hard, but he didn’t even flinch. He cannot feel his feet very well, nor can he tell if he has a full bladder or not, and his balance and proprioception are horrible. The physical therapist today, though, hadn’t worked with Drew in nearly a week, and he couldn’t believe his progress with some things, such as his sitting balance and standing up. Of course, he still has some things to work on and improve in the next 3 or 4 weeks of rehab (vision, sensation, balance, diet, wounds, safety, strength, bladder, cognition, etc.), but hopefully we can continue to make some progress with his physical, mental, and social recovery before he comes home.

The last bit of news we received this afternoon from the doctors was that they agreed to allow us to have a Ride Pass for this weekend, which means we are allowed to take him out of the hospital for a few hours to practice different transfers and activities. We try to achieve a few goals with the outing while also identifying the areas we need to continue to practice for the next 3 or so weeks in Rehab. In order to be ready for anything that might arise, his mother and I were trained how to administer his rescue medicine in case he has a prolonged seizure. We are also getting trained on how to empty his bladder even though we are planning to return to the hospital before he would need to have the straight catheter again. They pretty much said we could take him anywhere but our home, because he would not only be really confused, but it could be very difficult to get him to go back to the hospital. So, we’ll practice and train and see if we can take a field trip on Sunday for a few hours.

Shooting hoops in the Rehab Gym.

family, FIRES

It All Started With a Fever, Part 21

The Chronic Phase: Welcome to Rehab

The Social Worker at Primary Children’s Hospital told us that writing in a journal can be therapeutic. Even more, perhaps sharing our journey these past few weeks may help other families with children who suffer from this rare, devastating syndrome (F.I.R.E.S. = Febrile Infection-Related Epileptic Syndrome) or other chronic conditions.

Rehab Team, Day #2 (Saturday, September 9th)

72 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures today.

8:30 AM: “Drew, you need to swallow.”

Drew sat in his wheelchair with the bedside table pulled up close to him. He was working on a strawberry smoothie made with heavy cream and a few strawberries. The Speech Therapist had trained Dawn and myself how to assist him with eating and making sure he doesn’t choke or swallow down the wrong tube, and now that he is cleared to start eating, the doctors wrote the orders that he can only eat meals with the Speech Therapist or his parents present to assist.

Drew finally swallowed, and then said, “Why are they talking about me out there?” He turned to look out of the open doorway towards the nurses’ station where the nurses were busy giving their report as the new nurses prepared to start their day shift.

I stood up and closed the door. He is easily distracted and then it makes it harder for him to remember how to swallow, or to remember that he even has food in his mouth (even if is is just a smoothie). What would normally have taken Drew 10 minutes to eat now takes about 45 minutes, and Dawn or myself have to sit there and cue him and help him make sure he can eat without choking.

“Good job, Drew,” I said. He finally reached the bottom of the cup.

4:00 PM: We had about 20 more minutes of physical therapy to obtain for the day to get to his 3-hour allotment. He had tried to get it all in the morning, but he was falling asleep and having a hard time participating, so the physical therapist said he would return in the afternoon.

“Do you have a front-wheeled walker tall enough for Drew?” I asked. We had been having him walk in the room to the bathroom and a little bit in the therapy gym by having Drew hold onto our shoulders and then helping him under his arms. I thought maybe he was strong enough to try a longer walk by using the walker for more stability.

“Yes,” the Physical Therapist said. “Let me go grab it.”

While he ran for the walker, I lined Drew’s wheelchair up in the hallway. Once in place, Drew stood and grabbed onto the walker, although I had to assist his left arm up onto the handle and help his fingers to grasp the left handgrip.

With the physical therapist on one side and me on the other side, we were able to help Drew walk to the end of the hallway. However, his body was leaning all over the place and if not for the two of us, he would have fallen over multiple times. He required constant verbal cues to stand up straight, regain his balance, lift his legs higher, and steer away from the walls and objects in the pathway. Just the fact that he had the strength to walk that far was amazing, but his balance is very poor, as is his safety awareness and vision (everything is blurry right now). Considering that he was still coming out of his coma only 4 weeks ago, we are happy that he has made so much progress already.

9:30 PM: Drew had his first shower tonight as he prepared for Homecoming. The nurse assisted us as we tried to help him wash himself. The rehab staff need to get baseline measurements of his ability to perform hygiene and other daily activities so that they can measure his progress during his rehab stay.

I stood next to him the entire time so that I could help keep his tracheostomy fistula covered to prevent water from entering his lungs, and also to keep him from falling off the bath bench, which has no seat belt. As we were trying to let Drew as much as he could, I ended up getting a shower also and I was drenched from the knees down. However, the shower was much better than the bathtub because Drew was simply too tall to fit safely in the tub they have here.

His girlfriend arrived a little after 7:00 and we tried to stay out of the way as much as possible. Drew was so happy and excited to see her and they sat and visited about school, friends, choir, and other happenings. To finish out the evening, they played a game of Candy Land. His vision is so poor it is difficult for him to see much, but he could tell the colors on the cards OK and then his girlfriend helped him move his piece along the board. After the game finished, we started to watch the beginning of the BYU-Utah game, which Drew was excited to watch, but it started so late, he fell asleep before halftime. He had a pretty busy, exhausting, but good day.

Copper Hills Homecoming 2017

Rehab Team, Day #3 (Sunday, September 10th)

73 days since onset. Seizure count = Approximately 3 small seizures clustered together in the morning.

3:30 PM: I arrived from church back to the hospital just in time to see Dawn and Erin lifting Drew back into bed. He fell for the first time and luckily, his mother and sister helped him lower to the floor just onto his knees, but he scraped his left knee.

“He was sitting in the green recliner after he finished his afternoon snack,” his sister explained. “And all of a sudden, he stood up on his own.”

Dawn and Erin had helped Drew up out of bed to eat his afternoon snack (which was another heavy cream smoothie), but the problem with the recliner is that it doesn’t have a seat belt. He tried standing up on his own a few times, but this time they were cleaning up his snack and not ready.

Erin had stayed the night last night, and she was exhausted, so I encouraged her to try and take a nap before she had to drive back to school in Provo this evening. Dawn and I then finished situating Drew in bed, and then I went and talked to the nurse about the fall. She was not even aware it had occurred, but I figured the rehab staff better be aware because as he has regained some strength, he has also become more impulsive and stubborn about being able to get up.

6:15 PM: “Drew, does it taste good?” I asked him.

Drew started to nod his head, but then as he started to answer my question, he went to take a breath in and he inhaled the piece of chicken he had been chewing in his mouth.

He coughed and coughed and coughed, and then he finally gagged the chicken back out, but it also triggered everything else he had just eaten for dinner. I grabbed an emesis bag and handed it to him, helping him line it up to his mouth as he vomited.

Just as his legs and arms are weak, his mouth muscles are not used to chewing food, especially chicken. We also had reaffirmed that he really needs to focus while he tries to eat so that he can swallow properly and not get distracted.

More Homecoming 2017

Rehab Team Day #4 (Monday, September 11th)

74 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures today.

3:05 AM: Drew finally fell back asleep. He awoke about 35 minutes ago and was trying to climb out of bed. He had thrown his pillows and blanket on floor, and then was trying to get up over the bed rail. Luckily, I awoke in time to stop him. The nurses had shut the door and closed the window blind on the door, so they were not aware that he was even trying to get up until I hollered for him to stop.

5:30 AM: Drew awoke again about 4:00 AM and he just finally fell back asleep. I sat for over an hour and watched to prevent him from pulling out his feeding tube.

6:50: Drew fell back asleep after waking up again at 6:25 after the nurses had finished working with him. He sleeps really good until about 2:00 or so, but then he starts waking up and having trouble sleeping. Hopefully the doctors can figure out something to help him sleep better at night.

11:00 AM: Drew was so sleepy, he couldn’t complete all of his therapy this morning and he fell asleep. Luckily the therapists have time in their schedule to try back later in the afternoon to make up the minutes he missed.

8:00 PM: The nurse posted Drew’s schedule tonight, and he has pretty busy days with a few rest breaks sprinkled in the mix. The therapists were able to get the rest of his therapy finished, and tonight is another shower. Of course it would be easier if we just did his shower for him, but that doesn’t help in the long run as he needs to be able to return to doing things for himself. His mother and I assisted him for the shower, and it would seem we might want to bring swim trunks or a change of shoes and socks because we were soaked from the knee down.

Rehab Team Day #5 (Tuesday, September 12th)

75 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures today.

6:40 AM: Drew woke up at 3:15 AM today and just barely fell back asleep. I had to sit and watch him because he kept trying to pull out his feeding tube, pull of his pulse oximeter, and pull of the bandage over his tracheostomy fistula.

“Drew, you really need to get some sleep.”

“Why are you mad at me, Dad?”

“I’m not, Drew,” I said. “I just want you to be able to get the rest you need so that you can be able to do all of your therapy.”

7:30 AM: Despite the lack of sleep last night, Drew is on a schedule and the nurses said we need to get him up and going so that he can be ready for OT at 8:30. I think I am just as tired as Drew and I am not sure how we are going to make it through the day. It takes a lot of effort, but finally we are able to get Drew up to his wheelchair to start working on his blueberry smoothie for breakfast.

2:30 PM: I plead with the doctors to try and change his nighttime medication and nursing schedule to help improve his rest at night. He struggles to participate in the therapy when he is so tired, so the doctors were going to try and change some of the timing of the medications. Fortunately today, Drew was able to take a long nap so that he could participate in the afternoon therapy sessions, but unfortunately he slept through his lunch and they just had to give it to him through his feeding tube. At any rate, this afternoon in physical therapy, Drew was able to ride the bike outside for the first time.

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7:00 PM: Every Tuesday afternoon, the Rehab Team meets to review the rehab patients and their progress towards their goals. Today was the first meeting where they discussed Drew and his initial findings, and based upon their evaluations and assessments, they believe he will need about 4 to 6 weeks of rehab. I figured he would need at least a month anyway, but it all depends on how quickly his brain recovers.

Also, on the weekends, some of the patients can get a pass to leave the hospital for a few hours to try a community activity, such as the zoo or a store. However, after their discussion, the rehab staff decided that Drew is not yet ready for a weekend pass because of how impulsive he has been, and they want him to be a little safer and calmer before we take him for a short trip out of the hospital.

Lastly, today in Music Therapy, he started learning the songs for “My Fair Lady.” Unfortunately, his eyesight is not good enough for him to read the music or small print, so his mother plans to write the words larger. Without being able to see the words or musical notes, they struggled to get through two lines of the first song today. It’s a good thing they have 2 months to prepare for the musical.

Rehab Team Day #6 (Wednesday, September 13th)

76 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures today.

2:30 AM: I awoke to the sound of the bed alarm. I sat upright and saw Drew’s legs hanging over the bed rail and off the side of the bed. I ran over and lifted his legs back onto the bed.

“Dad, what are you doing?” He asked.

“Time to sleep, Drew,” I said. “You need to stay in bed.”

“Dad, I need to get up.”

“No, Drew, it is the middle of the night and you need to go back to bed.” Luckily he fell back asleep in only 20 minutes this time.

5:30 AM: “Dad! Dad!”

“Yes, Drew,” I said as I groggily sat up on the side of the fold-out couch.

“Dad, I need to go to the bathroom.”

This was his first time since he was sick that he felt the need to use the rest room, and if he could start to urinate on his own, he would no longer need the nurses to straight catheter him every 4 to 6 hours.

I jumped over to his bed and put his gripper socks on and we made our way to the bathroom. Unfortunately, after 20 minutes, he still couldn’t go and we had to make our way back to his bed without success.

10:30 AM: Fortunately, Drew went back to sleep from 6:30 to 7:15, and then we had to start getting him up to the wheelchair to have breakfast. He drank his whole strawberry smoothie for breakfast (although it took about 40 minutes to drink about 8 ounces), and he did really well getting himself dressed with OT and he walked to the therapy gym. He then came back to his room for a rest.

4:30 PM: Unfortunately, even with the seemingly better night sleeping, Drew took a 4-hour nap and slept not only through lunchtime, but also through his afternoon PT and OT sessions. Speech therapy was able to get some time in, but he then rushed up to Music Therapy for some more practice singing “My Fair Lady.”

Rehab Team Day #7 (Thursday, September 14th)

77 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures today.

7:15 AM: “Dad! Dad!”

“Yes, Drew,” I sat up on the edge of the fold-out couch.

“What time is it?” Drew asked.

“7:15 AM,” I told him, and then I realized he was trying to climb out of bed.

“I’m late for school,” Drew hollered at me as he tried to climb over the bedrail. “Seminary started at 6:00.”

“Drew, Drew…,” I said as I grabbed his legs and pushed them back on the bed. “You’re in the hospital. Remember?”

“What?” He asked.

“You’re in the hospital,” I repeated. “You don’t have to go to school yet. They know you’ve been sick.”

It took about 10 more minutes, but the nurse and I were finally able to convince him that he did not have to go to school today.

6:30 PM“This is all I get for dinner?” Drew said as he squinted down at the plate in front of him.

His mother tried to encourage him and explained, “There’s some scrambled eggs, part of an avocado, salsa, and ‘milk’ — you like all those things.”

“This is all I get for dinner?” Drew repeated. I looked at the plate and was a little surprised at how little they had brought him.

“We really need the doctors to change this diet,” I said. “There is no way the 4.5 to 1 ratio is sustainable, and he already is so sick of the lack of options and he hasn’t even been eating real food for one week yet.”

9:00 PM: Drew had a few friends from school visit tonight, and he enjoyed the company for the most part, but by the time they finished, he was super tired. His words were becoming more slurred, his eyes were half-open, and he was having a really hard time remembering words or making sense. The doctors ordered that Drew should not have more than 2 visitors in the room at a time (parents not included) — including doctors and other medical staff — so his friends had to rotate through a couple at a time.

Drew laughed and they laughed and overall it was good, but at some point, I started worrying that when he does go home and back to school, there will be many kids laughing AT Drew and not laughing WITH him. Between the prolonged seizures and the brain injury, it may take many weeks for him to return to normal. It is amazing that he can still read and write and do multiplication, but he cannot remember he is chewing food or cannot realize when his bladder is full or realize he is not safe to stand up without help. I suppose that will all just take time, but we are so physically drained, we are sure praying that these things all heal sooner than later — especially before we are supposed to take him home next month.

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Drew’s Eagle Project — August 2015

Rehab Team Day #8 (Friday, September 15th)

78 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures today.

7:45 AM: “Another smoothie?” Drew said as he sat and squinted at the cup in front of him on the tray. “This is like my 50th smoothie.”

Because the diet is so extreme, he gets a “smoothie’ four times per day, and it consists basically of 8 ounces of heavy cream, an egg, and a little bit of fruit. I would be sick of them too if I were Drew.

9:45 AM: “It looks like his bedsore has stalled,” the Wound Nurse told Dawn. “It really hasn’t improved much the past couple of weeks.”

“What does that mean?” Dawn asked.

“We may have to try something more extreme next week,” she said. The Wound Nurse then told my wife several things we could try to help it heal, or things we should be doing.

“Why are you telling me all of this?” Dawn asked. “Shouldn’t you be telling this to his nurse?”

“Well, you can help also,” the Wound Nurse explained.

“We have at least another month here,” Dawn said. “And we were hoping his bedsore would simply be healed by then. I really think you need to be telling his nurses what to do, and if he still has it next month, then we can talk about things to do at home.” Dawn later broke down and cried, feeling so overwhelmed at the possibility of yet one more medical concern she would have to care for when Drew goes home.

9:00 PM: He actually had a really good day with all of his therapy. He slept better last night, and that carried over into a better morning. However, he only had a 15-minute nap this afternoon, and he struggled to stay awake while he ate dinner (he couldn’t finish it because he was too tired). We got him into the shower again tonight and it went a little better.

Grandma and Grandpa visited again tonight, bringing some take-out Chinese food for Dawn and myself to eat while they sat with Drew.

As we later talked, Drew’s grandmother asked, “So do the doctors know if his vision and hearing and everything will be better by the time he goes home?”

“No,” I shook my head. “They really have no idea.”

family, FIRES

It All Started With a Fever, Part 20

The Sub-Acute Phase: Crazy Dreams and Crazy Diet

The Social Worker at Primary Children’s Hospital told us that writing in a journal can be therapeutic. Even more, perhaps sharing our journey these past few weeks may help other families with children who suffer from this rare, devastating syndrome (F.I.R.E.S. = Febrile Infection-Related Epileptic Syndrome) or other chronic conditions.

Neuro Floor, Day #16 (Saturday, September 2nd)

65 days since onset. Seizure count = 2 Focal Seizures today.

2:00 PM: Drew really likes riding the bicycle for therapy. It is a three-wheel bike with two seat belts to help with trunk support and straps on both pedals to keep his feet in place. One therapist has to help from behind the bike to keep Drew’s head and trunk from sliding while the other therapist walks/runs next to the bicycle to help Drew steer. Again, his left arm is still quite weak, so he keeps veering to the left. The therapists were really trying to let him do more of the steering this time since it was a Saturday and there were fewer people on the pedestrian bridge between the hospital and the outpatient medical building across the street.

Getting ready to ride.

4:00 PM: “Never mind, Alex,” Drew said in frustration.

“What’s wrong?” Alex asked. He was helping Drew remember how to play Clash of Clans on his iPhone.

“My eyes can’t see the screen very well,” Drew said.

“Hold on,” Alex said. He crossed the room and pulled his iPad out of his backpack. After a few moments, he had the game pulled up on the bigger screen and tried again with Drew.

“I still can’t see it, Alex.” They tried for several minutes with the screen held only inches from Drew’s face, but he could not make out any of the details. “I can’t see it.”

As he went to return his iPad to his back backpack, Alex passed me in the chair watching them and he said, “Sad part is that Drew was the one that taught me how to play Clash of Clans when I got home from my mission last sumer. We would play together and kick butt all the time, even when I was in Kentucky we could team up together. Now he can’t play….”

“Hopefully his eyes will recover soon,” I said. Although at this point we are not certain if the visual problems are due to injury to the parts of his brain that process visual input, or if the problems stem from his eye muscles or focusing. At some point the doctors will have ophthalmology return to screen his vision and make recommendations.

7:20 PM: “Dad, the game starts in 10 minutes.”

Drew was not happy with me and his mother because we insisted he get out of bed and go for a quick wheelchair ride to the patio. He hadn’t been out of bed since the bike ride in therapy and we knew he wouldn’t get up once the game started.

“We’ll be back in time for kick-off,” I said to Drew as we rolled down the hall to the elevators.

“Is that Drew?” Two nurses from the ICU approached us from the other end of the hallway as they had just finished shift change.

“Hello,” Drew said as he waved his right hand. “My name is Drew. Who are you?”

“I took care of you in the ICU a few weeks ago while you were sleeping,” the nurse explained to him. I recognized both of them and smiled, but Drew had no idea who they were (again, not sure if it was due to his eyesight or his memory, but probably a combination of both).

After we talked a few minutes, the nurses had to leave. “We’ll see you later, Drew.”

“OK,” he replied and waved his right hand, “Bye.”

As the nurses continued walking toward the stair leading to the lobby, the one nurse turned to the other and said, “Well that just made my day!”

8:45: One of the rehab doctors this morning challenged Drew to an arm wrestle to test his strength, but he struggled to even hold his grip, especially on the left hand. So the doctor instead challenged him to a thumb war, and Drew actually won both the right hand and the left hand. The doctor was amazed and assured me he had been trying to win, but Drew beat him. As a result, Drew challenged the two male nurses tonight to thumb wars as they gave him his medicines. He still gets the 4 Anakinra shots along with 6 seizure medications, vitamins, and an antibiotic all crushed up and administered through his feeding tube, so it takes quite a while for all of the medicines to be given. However, Drew actually beat both of the nurses as well. The one nurse laughed as Drew pinned him and said, “he has such long thumbs, and they are strong.”

Drew actually became more interested in the thumb wars with the nurses instead of the BYU football game against LSU on TV because he really couldn’t see the screen very well. We had to keep letting him know the score and clock and other info about the game because he couldn’t read them on the screen. However, within minutes of getting his last medication, he fell asleep just before halftime. We turned the TV off so he could sleep and his older sister, Erin, volunteered to stay with him so the rest of the family left for home as they settled down for the night.

Drew’s brother helping with the therapy session activity.

Neuro Floor, Day #17 (Sunday, September 3rd)

66 days since onset. Seizure count = 1 Focal Seizure today.

8:30 AM Erin reported that Drew awoke at 1:30 AM, 3:30 AM, and 6:30 AM for various reasons, so we talked to the doctors and nurses about scheduling some rest breaks during the daytime to help him stay awake later into the evening. We also agreed to let them give him some Melatonin to help him get back into a better sleep pattern at night. Once he was up for good at 6:30 AM, his sister turned on The Amazing Spider Man Part 2 for him to watch. She played the movie on her laptop computer and set it up on two pillows on his lap where he can see the screen better, even if he can’t make out all of the details.

11:00 AM: Drew went to church at the hospital with his mother and older sister for the first time this morning. He couldn’t take the bread, but he took the water as the Sacrament was passed.

When I returned to the hospital later in the afternoon, I asked, “So how did you like church, Drew?”

He answered, “I couldn’t really understand what the people were saying and a lot of them just cried.” As today was the first Sunday of the month, church consisted of a Fast and Testimony Meeting, and his mother explained that many of the people who shared their testimonies either talked too fast or too softly for Drew to be able to understand what they were saying.

6:30 PM: When I returned to the hospital after my church meetings were finished, his mother reported that Drew sat up in a chair next to his bed for a couple of hours in the afternoon and used the dry-erase board to work on some math, writing, and memory cues. He also watched a little bit of “My Fair Lady” with his mother and sister. I had to laugh because he challenged his brother and uncle and some of his visitors to thumb wars.

Drew loves Music Therapy.

Neuro Floor, Day #18 (Monday, September 4th)

67 days since onset. Seizure count = 1 Focal Seizure lasting about 70 minutes

9:15 AM: Drew started having a seizure at 8:58 this morning. It was a Focal Seizure where his eyes rolled up and deviated to the side, but it was quite sudden. He had been fully awake and talking to me and the nurses. We were going to get him up into a wheelchair for the morning because we found out with the Labor Day holiday today, therapy would not be coming to work with Drew until after lunchtime. So the nurse had just rolled Drew’s wheelchair into his room and I knelt down to remove the leg rests. When we turned back around to help Drew, he was having the seizure.

“Are you sure it’s a seizure?” The nurse asked me.

“Yes,” I said. “This is what the last several seizures have looked like, although sometimes he has more mouth twitching.”

A few moments passed as we waited for the seizure to stop, and at one point, his right eye stayed rolled up and deviated to the right while his left eye rolled downward and deviated in the opposite direction and looked really freaky. At that point, seven minutes had passed without the seizure breaking, so the nurse notified the attending doctors and she went to go get his “rescue medicine,”  which is a dose of Ativan. We had requested more specific guidelines from Neurology as to when he could get a “rescue” medicine to help break him out of a prolonged seizure, or cluster of seizures, and they had specified for him to get the medicine if he has a General Tonic-Clonic (Grand Mal) that lasts more than 5 minutes, or a Focal Seizure that lasts more than 10 minutes. By the time the nurse returned with the medication, 12 minutes had passed without the seizure stopping, so she gave him the medicine through his IV.

9:35 AM: The doctors just gave Drew a third dose of Ativan to try and stop this seizure. The first two doses seemed to work for about 30 seconds each time, but then he went right back into the seizure.

“If we cannot get the seizure to stop, we may have to transfer him back to the ICU,” the doctors told us.

“No,” Dawn said as she leaned closer to Drew and squeezed his hand. “Come on, Drew. Wake up!” Tears were streaming down her cheeks.

9:55 AM: Despite the third dose of Ativan, his seizure did not stop and the group of hospitalist doctors in the hallway talked with the Neurology doctors. They agreed to try one more medicine — a dose of Fosphenytoin — which is more powerful, but also has more side effects.

“If the Fosphenytoin doesn’t work, or if his breathing starts to becme suppressed with all of the medicines on board, we will have to move Drew to the ICU,” the doctors told us while the nurses worked frantically to hook up the IV pump that would administer the medicine. “We also need to hook him back up to an EEG for the next several hours to help us watch for any more seizure activity.”

Dawn collapsed in a chair and started to sob. I tried to comfort her and rubbed her shoulders as we watched the commotion going on around Drew’s bed. “Don’t cry,” I said to her. “It will be all right. Drew will pull out of this.”

“Today wasn’t supposed to be like this,” she said. Then angrily, she looked up at me and added, “And there’s no way I want to go back to that hellish nightmare.”

I am fearful that if Drew does have return to the ICU, Dawn may have some PTSD and be pretty traumatized by the setback.

11:30 AM: It took about 15 minutes for the full dose of Fosphenytoin to run into Drew’s IV and it appears to have finally stopped the seizure, so we were able to avoid transferring back to the ICU for the moment. However, all of the medicines have made Drew extremely sleepy and dropped his blood pressure down to 85/42. The nurses are pushing fluids through his IV to help raise his blood pressure back up. Meanwhile, the doctors are running a bunch of tests to try and figure this out, and they are getting ready to hook him back up to an EEG for a little while. They plan to watch him closely for the next several hours to make sure his seizure has stopped and his breathing stays good.

9:00 PM: Drew is doing much better tonight. The Ativan is finally wearing off and he is back to talking and laughing and hugging everyone. He helped us sing “Happy Birthday” for my birthday tonight. He had one 30-second seizure this afternoon, but otherwise his seizures have been fine since the big one this morning. They really coudn’t identify any reason for the prolonged seizure, and the Neurology doctors are not even sure they want to call it a seizure, but rather they are referred to it as an “event.” His labs came back good. His Phenobarbital level was in range. Nothing else really changes, so they aren’t sure what cause the “event.” Hopefully we are back on schedule tomorrow with rehab and maybe even removing the tracheostomy, but we’ll see what the doctors decide.

Neuro Floor, Day #19 (Tuesday, September 5th)

68 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures today.

3:00 AM: “Dad,” Drew yelled. “Dad!”

“What’s the matter Drew?” I answered from the fold-out couch in the corner of the room.

“Get her away from me,” Drew yelled as he tried to hit the nurses’ aide sitting beside his bed. At night, he continues to require a 1-on-1 nurses’ aide to keep him from pulling out his tubes.

“Drew, be nice,” I said.

“Get away!” Drew continued to yell and swing. “Dad, get me out of here!”

It took us several minutes to calm him down. Every morning he has been waking up between 2:00 and 4:00 and started pulling at his IV and feeding tube and breathing tube. He often forgets he is still in the hospital and starts swinging at the nurses and aides, but I have been able to talk to him and calm him down. Luckily, he fell back asleep this morning after about 25 minutes of yelling.

4:00 PM: The EEG came off about 2 hours ago and his hair is all gummed up with the glue from the 19 different leads that had been attached to his scalp. The nurses and his mother plan to give him a bath this evening and work on getting all the EEG glue washed out of his hair.

9:00 PM: No seizures today. Drew was able to participate in all of his physical, occupational, and speech therapy sessions, but he did fall asleep during both speech therapy treatments. His speech has been a little slurred and his responses a little delayed today, so they think he may still have a little bit of the rescue medicines in his system, but overall a much better day than yesterday.

The doctors told us today that they plan to try and increase Drew’s therapy treatments this week to see if he can tolerate 3 hours per day. So starting tomorrow he will have separate PT, OT, and Speech treatments in the morning and again in the afternoon, as well as Music Therapy from 3:30 to 4:30. His Rest Breaks will remain the same for now. Even though his tracheostomy was capped all day today with no problems, the doctors are talking that they may postpone taking the tracheostomy out for another day or two just in case he has more seizures like yesterday, but we will talk to them tomorrow and try to move it up since he had no seizures today. It just goes to show that so long as the seizures stay away, he will continue to do great.

Neuro Floor, Day #20 (Wednesday, September 6th)

69 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures today.

2:45 AM: I awoke to the sound of a ‘crash.’

“Where do you think you are going?” The nurse’s aide said as she ran into our dimly-lit room. I then realized that Drew had swung his legs over the bed rail and was trying to climb out of bed.

“Whoa,” I said as I jumped up off the fold-out couch and ran to the side of Drew’s bed. I arrived before the nurse’s aide and grabbed his legs to keep him from getting out of bed. “Drew, stop.”

“Pull me up, Dad,” Drew said, speech slurred, eyes half-open. “Help me out of here.”

“No, Drew,” I said. “You need to stay in bed.”

“Get me out of here, Dad.”

“You’re OK,” the nurse’s aide said. “Let’s go back to sleep.”

“Help me, Dad.”

“I’m right here, Drew.” I pulled up a chair and sat next to his bed, holding his hand. It took about 30 minutes for him to fall back asleep again.

4:00 AM: Just as I was falling back asleep, Drew tried crawling out of bed again. We stopped him and repeated the same routine to keep him in bed and help him fall back asleep.

7:00 AM: “Can you help me brush my teeth, Dad?”

“Sure, Drew.” I handed him his tooth brush with a pearl of Ketogenic-friendly toothpaste and assisted him with brushing and rinsing his teeth.

After he finished putting on chap stick, as we were waiting for nursing to bring his medications and occupational therapy to start at 8:30, we sat talking.

“Did you have a bad dream last night?” I asked Drew.

“Yeah,” he said. “I had a dream that I was in a tomb full of mummies and I was trying to get out of it.” He continued to describe the dream to me, and then it made perfect sense why he was confused and trying to get out of bed a few hours earlier.

4:00 PM: We didn’t even have to discuss the tracheostomy schedule with the doctors. The Respiratory Therapy Director came into Drew’s room this afternoon and announced that it was time to remove the cannula. She explained that based upon his capping trial tolerance, there was no need to postpone taking out his tracheostomy, so she carefully removed it and covered the fistula with a small bandage. She explained that the hole will heal over time on its own and to just keep it clean and covered so nothing enters into his throat and lungs until it heals.

When I arrived from work, Drew’s eyes lit up and he said, “Hey, Dad, I have a hole in my throat.” The bandage over the hole was flapping around the edges as Drew’s voice was nearly blasting the cover off. His words were breathy because of the hole in his throat, but I could make out what he was saying.

Lastly today, with the tracheostomy removed, speech therapy scheduled him for a swallow study on Friday and she brought in some real food to start practicing eating. Her options were limited thanks to his Ketogenic diet, but she brought in some fresh avocado and Drew loved it.

Removing Drew’s tracheostomy cannula.

Breathing tube out!

Neuro Floor, Day #21 (Thursday, September 7th)

70 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures today.

7:30 AM: Drew had a really bad night again last night. He woke up screaming for me three different times. The nurse’s aide was no longer able to help after 6:00 AM this morning, so I was sitting next to Drew’s bed watching him when he started talking in his sleep.

“It’s still looking at me, Dad.” His eyes were half-open and it seemed like he was looking through me at something on the wall.

He recoiled and tried to move away from me in the bed, “Help me, Dad.”

“I’m right here, Drew.” I held his hand as he slowly fell back asleep.

8:25 AM: The nurse just finished giving Drew his medications, and we had a few minutes until the OT would arrive to start his treatment, so we were talking again and Drew was telling me about the crazy dream he was having this morning.

“You were there with me, Dad. We were helping Santa Claus in his sleigh, and as we were flying along with the Christmas Spirit, I looked down and saw a bunch of baby moose. We stopped to look at them, and then I saw a big moose that was trying to kill me with his antlers.”

On the one hand, Drew is finally getting more sleep. But on the other hand, he is having really vivid, crazy dreams. Hopefully these will continue to resolve as his brain heals.

4:45 PM: So Drew will be officially transferring to the Rehab Team tomorrow afternoon. He will be getting evaluated and tested by the Rehab Team over the Weekend and then on Tuesday, they will have a better estimate of how much longer he will be in the hospital. Right now they are estimating 3 to 5 weeks in Rehab, and then outpatient therapy once we get home. Because of his brain injury, he will need to be supervised 24/7 for several weeks after he returns home. The plan is to keep him on all 7 of his medicines and the Ketogenic diet for at least 2 months before making any changes. As the Rheumatology doctor explained, they feel like his inflammatory system has finally calmed down and they want to keep it calm while he rehabilitates. Down the road, they can revisit his diet and medicines to see if they can be decreased without allowing the seizures to return, but for now, status quo — and really, other than the one bad seizure last Monday, his seizures have been doing really well.

Drew with his older sister and brother in the waterfall garden.

Rehab Team, Day #1 (Friday, September 8th)

71 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures so far today.

10:00 AM Drew had a pretty good morning so far. He slept a little better last night because I kept the light above the sink on all night. He still woke up at 2:00 AM thinking he had to go to school, but with the light on, he was able to remember more quickly that he was in the hospital and It took less time to calm him down. He also got up with OT this morning and got himself dressed (with a little help) and then PT worked his legs really hard in the gym. He came back almost asleep in the wheelchair, so we laid him back down and he is taking a nap. Swallow study is supposed to be at 11:00 and then this afternoon he will be officially transferred to Rehab.

Noon: Drew passed the Swallow Study with flying colors. The Speech Therapist gave him some water and pudding mixed with barium, and then she and the Radiologist watched on X-ray as Drew swallowed. He needed a little water to wash some residual pudding down, but otherwise he swallowed without coaching or problems.

Drew’s first real meal, even if it is Ketogenic.

3:30 PM: Drew had his first meal with Speech Therapy this afternoon. Once he was cleared by the Swallow Study, he was allowed to practice a full, Ketogenic tray of food. The Speech Therapist brought a tray of chicken, bacon, avocado, salsa, butter, and heavy cream. Drew freaked out with the smell of the bacon and said it was going to make him throw up, so we had to get rid of the bacon initially. He ended up eating the chicken, salsa, and avocado with the butter and heavy cream mixed in to raise the fat ratio. He also drank some water. He will start getting some trays now at meal times to see if he can start eating, but because of his crazy, Ketogenic diet, it will be heavy on fats with very few proteins and practically no carbohydrates. The Speech Therapist laughed and said Drew is the first Ketogenic patient she has worked with here who was actually eating the Ketogenic food and not just getting all of his nutrition through his feeding tube. We’re all going to be learning this strange diet together since Drew will be on it for at least two months.

4:30 PM: The Rehab Doctor stopped in to talk to us briefly. She has written the orders and now Drew has been officially admitted onto the Rehab Team.

WELCOME TO REHAB!!!

family, FIRES

It All Started With A Fever, Part 19

The Sub-Acute Phase: Baby Steps

The Social Worker at Primary Children’s Hospital told us that writing in a journal can be therapeutic. Even more, perhaps sharing our journey these past few weeks may help other families with children who suffer from this rare, devastating syndrome (F.I.R.E.S. = Febrile Infection-Related Epileptic Syndrome) or other chronic conditions.

Neuro Floor, Day #9 (Saturday, August 26th)

58 days since onset. Seizure Count = 5 Focal Seizures today.

7:30 AM: “Drew, your bladder is full,” I told him after the nurse finished scanning his bladder with an ultrasound. “Can you try to go to the bathroom?”

“I don’t have to go right now,” Drew said. He has not regained full sensation and he continues to have weakness and limited motor control throughout his body, so we’re trying to practice and facilitate his bladder muscles.

“Drew, if we don’t try to go to the bathroom,” I explain to him, “then the nurses will have to use a catheter because your bladder is full. Can you try to go?”

“I guess,” Drew shrugged his shoulders, “but I really don’t have to go.”

I helped Drew sit up on the side of the bed. As he rolled and sat up, I held his head while he helped to pull his trunk up and then I helped swing his feet out of bed.

“Go ahead and count to 3, Drew, and then we will stand up,” I say as I stand in front of him, his hands on my shoulders, and my arms under his shoulders holding his trunk steady.

“One… Two… Three,” he said and then he leans forward and I help lift him to stand up on his wobbly legs. I held his trunk upright as he struggles to shift and pivot his feet, but then eventually he is lined up with the shower chair (which has wheels) and we slowly lower down onto the seat. I then rolled him into the bathroom, and we repeat the process to stand and pivot to the toilet. We have to shove a pillow behind him so he can lean back against the plumbing, and then he holds onto some grab bars on the wall to steady himself. Even still, either his mother or myself have to help him hold his head up, especially as he begins to fatigue.

Despite trying for several minutes, he cannot release his bladder to empty. As he becomes more fatigued and starts leaning, we reverse the process and get him back to bed before he is too tired to help us. The last thing we need is for him to have a seizure or fall and injure himself and prolong our hospital stay.

2:30 PM: We repeated the attempt at the bathroom three more times in the morning, but still no success. However, he was so tired from all of the transfers, he fell asleep and the PT and OT had to reschedule his therapy appointment from 10:00 to 2:00. We had to work to get him to wake up, but once he was awake, he readily agreed to participate. He worked with them on unsupported sitting and rolling on the mat, and then as an added bonus, he played catch with his girlfriend, M❤️❤️❤️❤️. He felt ready to have his friends visit, but we thought we better start small and make sure he didn’t freak out again. So M❤️❤️❤️❤️ came up this afternoon and not only did they have a nice visit, she helped inspire him to work harder in therapy.

Playing catch in physical therapy with his girlfriend.

Neuro Floor, Day #10 (Sunday, August 27th)

59 days since onset. Seizure count = 3 Focal today (one for 7 minutes)

5:30 PM: “I was asleep for 7 weeks and 3 days,” Drew told his friends from school. “I woke up on August 24th.”

I returned from my church meetings this afternoon to find Drew’s room full of visitors, mostly his aunts and uncles and grandparents, but he had his attention focused almost exclusively on three of his friends from high school.

“I need you to sign me up for auditions tomorrow,” he said to his best friend. “I won’t be at school tomorrow, but I hope to be able to make it in time for the auditions.”

His friends kind of looked at his mother and I wondering if this was true or not.

“We’ve told him he won’t make it to auditions,” his mother said,  “But he keeps hoping they’ll figure out some way for him to go.” The auditions at the high school are for this year’s musical, ‘My Fair Lady.’

His friends did bring some of the sheet music for the audition, and they sat and sang with him a few bars of “On the Street Where You Live.”

A short time later, as his friends prepared to leave, his mother tried one more time saying, “Drew, you won’t be able to leave the hospital tomorrow for the audition.”

“I know,” he said. “That sucks.”

8:30 PM: This evening we got Drew into his wheelchair and took him for a ride out to the waterfall garden in front of the hospital, and while he was out there, he saw the parking garage and wanted to go see his car. So his mother and brother and sister rolled him out to his car for a few minutes and he looked at his old car. At least once per day, we try to go outside with Drew and take in some fresh air. Once he returned to his room, he was pretty tired, but he was still able to play catch with his brother for about 45 minutes. They would throw a soft football back and forth as they talked about remembering things like his address and movies and different things they used to do together.

This morning, the doctors said that they plan to start “capping” his tracheostomy tomorrow for a couple of hours. Each day, they will gradually increase the time his tracheostomy is capped and hopefully after a week or so, he will be able to get the tracheostomy removed. We continue to be very blessed with his progress and pray it continues at such an incredibly fast rate.

9:30 PM: “Can I have a hug?” Drew asked each one of his siblings and his mother as they prepare to go home. One by one, they lean over the rail of his bed and he grabs them with his arms and gives them each a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

Lastly, we resumed one other tradition to close each day with a family prayer. Since Drew is in the hospital, we gather around his bed with folded arms and bowed heads and say family prayer. Last night, he kind of watched us with his eyes open, as if he wasn’t sure what we were doing. Tonight, however, he closed his eyes and bowed his head along with the rest of us, and when his sister said, “Amen,” he said “Amen” as well.

Neuro Floor, Day #11 (Monday, August 28th)

60 days since onset. Seizure count = 1 Focal Seizure today.

9:30 AM: Drew’s mother arrived at the hospital just as the fourth team of doctors were finishing their assessment, and Drew looked exhausted, with slurred speech, half-open eyes, and delayed responses.

“I’m not sure what we can do to get him to sleep longer at night?” I asked. “He was so tired last night from all of his visitors that he fell asleep by 8:45 PM, and then he woke up this morning at 4:15 AM and has been awake since.”

“Are you sure it was 4:15 this morning?” She asked me.

“Yes, because he kept trying to pull all of his tubes out and the nurse assistants kept telling him to stop,” I said. “So I woke up also, and neither one of us has slept since then.”

“Well, that is going to make his physical therapy hard again,” Dawn said as she shook her head. The physical and occupational therapists have been trying to work with Drew each weekday at 10:00 AM, but about half the time he has fallen back asleep or is too tired.

“It doesn’t help that from 7:00 AM onward there are four different teams of doctors all taking turns examining Drew, as well as the nurses and respiratory therapy all coming in and doing assessments throughout the morning, asking him questions, testing his muscles and his memory, and so there isn’t much time for a nap until late morning when he is supposed to do physical therapy,” I said. “If only he could sleep until 7:00, that would be ideal, but not sure why he wakes up so early?”

Sure enough, by the time the physical and occupational therapists arrived at 10:10 AM, Drew had fallen back asleep and couldn’t wake up for them. They rescheduled to try back at 2:00 for his therapy session.

11:30 PM: So today, the doctors switched Drew from continuous feeding through his feeding tube to bolus feedings, which prepare him for a more-normalized routine to transition back to mealtimes. He continues to work with speech therapy on swallowing, but he is a ways away from trying to eat any food yet, especially on the Ketogenic diet (so we have been careful not to eat any food in his room in front of him). However, tonight was kind of a perfect storm and the result was him throwing up.

Drew was nearing the end of his dinnertime bolus feed when the nurse started to give him his evening medications through his feeding tube. We were also helping him to brush his teeth for bedtime, and as he was trying to rinse and spit, some of the water went down his windpipe and he started coughing. As he coughed, his gag reflex kicked in and he threw up all over his shirt. I quickly rolled him to his side and he proceeded to throw up all over his shirt and pillow. He threw up quite a bit, including half of his evening medicines. So after we got him cleaned up, the nurse had to go call the doctor and get orders to re-administer the medicines he threw up, and then pharmacy had to send them up again. Unfortunately, while I turned around to put his dirty clothes away, I turned back around to find that Drew had pulled out his IV (“I thought it was some dead skin,” he said). Finally, the nurses were able to give him the rest of his medicine and he was cleaned up and ready for bed, but it was pretty late and I couldn’t wait up for the IV Team to come give him a new IV.

Up to a chair bright and early, dressed and ready for the day.

Neuro Floor, Day #12 (Tuesday, August 29th)

61 days since onset. Seizure count = 1 Focal Seizure today.

9:30 AM: I talked to the doctors this morning about trying to figure out how we can get Drew to sleep better at night. After he threw up last night and pulled out his IV, we didn’t get to sleep until almost midnight. Then the nurses had to come in at 4 AM to give him his Anakinra shots (which still hurt a lot) and then at 6 AM to do a bladder scan and insert a catheter to help him empty his full bladder. Drew and I were both exhausted from lack of sleep and a steady stream of healthcare workers. As Drew gets tired, his speech and memory and attention definitely get worse. The doctors’ initial solution was to cut down on his daytime naps, but I told them we can’t cut down on naps until he is sleeping better at night. We’re both getting interrupted so many times, the daytime naps are a natural result (although I don’t get a nap because I have to go to work). After some discussion, they agree to consolidate all of his medicines and shots at 8:00 and to decrease the frequency of some of his vital signs and bladder scans.

5:30 PM: “Do you like my shoes?” Drew asks the nurse. He has already asked her this same question three times today, but either he can’t recognize her face or he has forgotten that he told her, so he is asking her again.

“Yes,” the nurse answers, “those are nice shoes.” She nods politely at his orange and gray high-top tennis shoes.

“These shoes are size 13 and they only cost $30,” Drew says as he points at his feet. “And can you believe they came from Wal-Mart?”

“No way,” the nurse says to him.

“Yes, Wal-Mart,” Drew said. “They are freaking sweet shoes.”

His brother turns to me and says, “You know, the old Drew would never buy shoes at Wal-Mart.”

“I know,” I replied. “After all he has been through, I’m glad to see him get excited about anything.”

Neuro Floor, Day #13 (Wednesday, August 30th)

62 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures today.

11:00 AM: Drew walked today in therapy! He was unsteady and ataxic, but he was able to take 5 steps as I and his physical therapist helped him. His right arm and leg are definitely stronger than his left arm and leg (Which is why Neurology wants to do another MRI of Drew’s brain in the next week or so) and his trunk and neck muscles are still weak, but he was able to walk to his wheelchair at the conclusion of his therapy session this morning. His biggest challenge right now continues to be his sleep and getting some rest breaks during the daytime that don’t interfere with his therapy sessions.

8:30 PM: Drew was lucky to have three of his friends from high school visit this afternoon. They talked to him for quite a while, pulling up pictures on their phones and talking about school and friends and dances and normal teenager topics. After a while, we got him up to a wheelchair and they escorted him to the waterfalls and garden in front of the hospital. He was very tired, but no chance he was going to fall asleep with three teenage girls visiting him. One of them gave him a gift before leaving, and he was thrilled to see that she gave him a “Star Wars” fleece blanket.

Enjoying a summer evening with three friends by one of the waterfalls.

Of course Drew did not make it to auditions yesterday for the high school musical, but his mother emailed the director and asked if Drew could still take part in the ensemble. Based upon his amazing progress, we are hopeful he can still participate to some extent with the musical when it is performed in November. The response was a resounding ‘yes’ and not only that, there were several tributes to Drew throughout the auditions as he was missed. We are so grateful to the faculty, staff, and students at Copper Hills High School for their wonderful support and encouragement. The director sent us the sheet music for the songs and the Music Therapist and his mother will start helping him learn the songs next week. Even though it is not one of the leads, he is really excited to be able to still take part in “My Fair Lady.”

Auditions at Copper Hills High School for “My Fair Lady.”

9:30 PM: “Is it OK if we have family prayer before we go home for the night?” Drew’s mother asked.

“Sure,” Drew said.

“I think it’s your turn, Drew,” I said. His younger sister was at work, and his brother was out with some friends, so it was just Dawn, Erin, and myself. “Do you think you can say the prayer tonight?”

“Sure,” he said. “Everyone close your eyes.”

He paused and waited for us all to fold our arms and close our eyes, and then he started, “Heavenly Father…. We thank thee for the day we had today….” In the end, he gave a short, but sweet prayer that left us all crying, especially as he asked for continued healing and progress from his seizures. As his mother and sister departed, there was a sweet spirit in the room that lingered long after the prayer finished.

Neuro Floor, Day #14 (Thursday, August 31st)

63 days since onset. Seizure count = No seizures today.

9:00 AM: “I can see a little better today,” Drew said.

“Really?” I asked. “Tell me what you can see on your wall…”

The wall opposite his bed is decorated with cards, posters, and pictures.

“I can see the big letters along the top that spell ‘We ❤️ DREW,” he said. “I can also see there is a red octa… shape with black letters in it.”

“You’re right, Drew,” I nodded. “There is a ‘STOP’ sign with some words in it.”

He proceeded to read some of the bigger letters and shapes, such as a large card with a heart and his name in it, but many of the smaller letters and words were blurry. He said he could mostly just see colors and blurry shapes, but not the details.

2:45 PM: Unfortunately Drew was asleep when the PT and OT team stopped by in the morning, but they rescheduled for this afternoon and it was worth the wait. They helped him onto a three-wheeled bicycle and then took him for a ride across the bridge that connects the hospital with the outpatient office building. He loved it. He struggled at times to hold his head up and sit tall, and he kept veering to the left because his left arm is weak, but for the majority of the ride he powered the bike and steered it himself. After he finished, his left leg and arm were visibly shaking from the exertion, but Drew hardly noticed.

8:30 PM: As the University of Utah football team played their first game of the year tonight, we worked our way through the crowd and traffic back up to the hospital to find that we had just missed two of Drew’s co-workers from his job at the Kearns Fitness Center. They brought a bundle of cards from his other co-workers, along with a stuffed monkey in swim trunks to remind him of work. He loved it. Initially, he did not recognize them, but as they talked, he quickly remembered them and started asking all sorts of questions about the staff, the remodel project, and other details about work. After they finished, he was elated that they stopped by to wish him well.

Drew called him “Super Monkey” because he thought he had a cape, so we converted the monkey’s shirt to a cape.

Neuro Floor, Day #15 (Friday, September 1st)

64 days since onset. Seizure count = 2 Partial seizures today.

8:30 PM: Another bike ride today in therapy, and Drew was loving it even if the pedestrians on the bridge to the outpatient building were not. I spent the day trying to help Drew’s brother fix a car for him to take back to school to Provo, so I wasn’t around as much during the afternoon, but his mother said it was a good day overall.

However, in the evening, we were struggling to keep Drew awake long enough to make an attempt at using the bathroom and taking a bath. He was so incredibly tired after his therapy and visitors and did not have a nap since the morning, so his speech was really slurred and his eyes were half open. To help him stay awake, we played catch with a nerf football with him. He can throw the ball pretty hard and accurately with his right hand, and he can catch it most of the time if it goes into his lap. We tried to keep him talking and throwing until the nurses were finally finished with their shift change and ready to help (also, the nurse was trying to get all of Drew’s medicines first, which delayed his help as he has to crush them and dissolve them all in water for his feeding tube). It took maximal effort to get him to the toilet, but within minutes of sitting down, he fell asleep and could not be woke up. It took me and the nurse and his mother all lifting him to get him back to bed, and even still, we barely got him there. From what I have researched, 50% of patients with brain injury have sleep disturbances, both in sleep initiation and sleep maintenance, and yet sleep and mental rest are critical to recovery from a brain injury. We continue to try and work with the nurses to figure out a schedule for Drew to help him improve his sleep.

Alex and Drew and Super Monkey. Drew is not happy his brother borrowed Super Monkey’s shades.

 

family, FIRES

It All Started With a Fever, Part 18

The Acute Phase: The “Miracle Boy”

The Social Worker at Primary Children’s Hospital told us that writing in a journal can be therapeutic. Even more, perhaps sharing our journey these past few weeks may help other families with children who suffer from this rare, devastating syndrome (F.I.R.E.S. = Febrile Infection-Related Epileptic Syndrome) or other chronic conditions.

“I believe there’s an inner power that makes winners or losers. And the winners are the ones who really listen to the truth of their hearts.” – Rocky Balboa

Neuro Floor, Day #3 (Sunday, August 20th) — 52 days since onset

5:00 PM: “What do we have to do?” Drew mouthed to me when I returned to the hospital after church.

He was lying in bed with half-opened eyes, surrounded by the rest of the family. I wasn’t entirely sure what he was saying, “Are you asking me what to do?”

“What do we have to do?” He repeated. This time his mother helped me to read his lips.

“We have to work on getting stronger and get better,” I answered.

“What do we have to do?” He asked again.

“We will work with therapy the next few weeks, and then we will get strong enough to go home.” I explained more slowly.

Drew shook his head in frustration. “Do you hate me?” He mouthed.

“Of course we don’t hate you,” I shook my head.

“Do you hate me?” He repeated.

His mother leaned in close to his bed, “We love you very much, Drew.”

“Do you hate me?” He looked like he wanted to cry.

“No, Drew,” I said. “We love you very much.”

I don’t think he understood.

8:00 PM: “Tell them to go,” Drew was mouthing to us as he repeatedly waved his hand toward the door.

M❤️❤️❤️❤️ and her parents had stopped by in the evening to visit, but Drew surprised us when he became upset and angry.

“Drew, be nice to them,” I said. “They drove all the way up here to see you.”

“Tell them to go,” Drew repeated. He closed his eyes and shook his head as he continued waving for them to leave.

“Drew, why don’t you want them to visit?” I asked.

He kept his eyes closed tightly and kept shaking his head no.

“Do you not want them to see you?”

He continued to shake his head no.

“Do you not want them to see you? Are you worried what they might think?”

Drew nodded his head yes. Despite any and all reassurances, Drew would not calm down and would not visit with them, so his visitors slowly filed out of the room and wished him well. Tears came to my eyes as I realized he was finally starting to became aware of his sickness and his condition.

“OK, Drew, you tell us when you feel you will be ready for your friends to visit.”

In the end, I suppose we have had 7 weeks to process and grieve, and now that he is finally waking up, Drew is starting to go through the same emotions as he processes how much his life has changed due to his illness.

October 2016

Neuro Floor, Day #4 (Monday, August 21st) — 53 days since onset

8:30 AM: After such a traumatic and emotional evening, Drew woke up in a better mood this morning. He would mouth to us that he was “A-OK” and flash us an OK sign with his hands and fingers. However, he did not remember where he was and I had to remind him he was still in the hospital. He still has not moved his legs much and is only showing a flicker of muscle movement in his thighs.

1:00 PM: Unfortunately, Drew’s feeding tube clogged this morning and the nurses worked for nearly an hour to unclog it, but in the end, they had to pull the old tube out and insert a new feeding tube. The process is rather uncomfortable as they thread the tube up through one of his nostrils and then down the back of his throat to his stomach. He squirmed and winced the entire time. Once they had it threaded, Radiology came and took an X-ray to check its placement. As a result, the morning medications were a few hours late, and he became really sleepy when the therapists came into the room to work with him.

7:30 PM: “Dad, do you remember where you parked our car?” Drew asked me as I entered his room. I was shocked to actually hear his voice — although it was raspy and barely audible.

I walked over to his bed and leaned in close. “Why, yes, Drew, I remember where I parked our car, but we can’t leave the hospital right now.”

“The Respiratory Therapists put in a smaller tracheostomy cannula this afternoon,” Dawn explained to me. “The smaller cannula will help him to wean off of the tracheostomy by building up his lung and diaphragm muscles. It will also allow Speech Therapy to put a valve on the end of the cannula to allow him to speak.”

“Dad, do you remember where you parked our car?” Drew asked again.

“Yes, Drew, I know right where I parked,” I answered. Then to his mother, I said, “sounds like he doesn’t need a valve to speak.”

“His lungs are strong enough that he started speaking to us tonight without the valve,” his mom said.

9:15 PM: As his mother, sisters, and brother were preparing to leave for the evening, Drew asked in his breathy, raspy voice, “When do I get to go home?”

“We’re not sure,” his mother answered. “We love you very much and will be back in the morning.”

“When do I get to go home?” He asked again.

“Soon, Drew,” I said. “Soon….”

Neuro Floor, Day #5 (Tuesday, August 22nd) — 54 days since onset

5:30 AM: I was awake most of the night watching Drew because he kept trying to pull out all of his lines and leads. He doesn’t even realize he is doing it most of the time, but just feels the tape on his skin and tries to pull it off. He nearly got his feeding tube out a couple of times, and he had such a hard time getting it replaced, I didn’t want to see him go through that again.

9:00 PM: Drew has been talking a lot today — with and without the valve on his tracheostomy. As he has been talking, we realized he has had difficulty remembering words and names. He even had to be reminded of his brother’s and sisters’ names. He worked with physical therapy today in the rehab gym and practiced sitting on the edge of the mat for about 15 minutes. He also worked with speech therapy and swallowed some sips of water and ice chips, but it was difficult for him to consistently direct the water down his esophagus and not his wind pipe. His mouth and throat muscles are just as weak as his legs and arms, but the doctors have been so impressed with how much he is progressing, they said he may be ready for the full rehab within two weeks so long as his seizures continue to remain stable. We started tracking his seizures to monitor the effectiveness of the medications, and he was down to only about 12 seizures on Sunday, then down to about 6 on Monday, and then only 4 so far today. Overall he has come a long way in only 6 days, but still a little way to go. I am sure Drew would have much rather been in school today.

First trip outside the hospital in nearly 8 weeks.

Neuro Floor, Day #6 (Wednesday, August 23rd) — 55 days since onset

11:00 AM: Unfortunately, Drew had a seizure about 20 minutes before the physical and occupational therapists came in to work with him, so he was kind of sleepy and tired in his post-icthal state. They were able to get him up to the cardiac chair and then both therapists helped him to slide from the cardiac chair over to the mat in the corner of the rehab gym. The gym is a large, open space with mirrors, white walls, white cabinets, three mat tables, and various other pieces of equipment, such as adaptive bicycles, practice stairs, and swings. The therapists have been working with Drew on unsupported sitting, kicking a ball, throwing a ball, rolling, and lying prone on the mat.

Noon: Drew just finished working with the speech therapist. She was able to attempt feeding him with some Ketogenic-friendly sour cream that had been dyed blue. Drew did great with the first two swallows, but the third swallow, he kind of inhaled as he tried to remove the sour cream from the spoon. He sat for a couple of minutes with a stunned look on his face as he realized something wasn’t right, but he couldn’t figure out what to do. After the speech therapist coached him on clearing his throat and coughing, it seemed he was able to redirect the sour cream. However, a minute later, he coughed again and blue foam came out around his tracheostomy.

5:00 PM: Drew’s favorite part of the day is Music Therapy, and today he sang along with the speech therapist for the first time instead of just listening. The songs are simple and familiar to help the patients remember, such as the alphabet song and nursery rhymes, and even still, he would often echo the words and need frequent prompting to remember the words.

9:30 PM: “I heard he’s talking now?” One of the Respiratory Therapists from the ICU poked his head into Drew’s room. He worked with Drew a lot while he was in the ICU, but he had been on vacation for the past week and had not seen Drew since the ICU.

“Drew,” I said, “can you say ‘hello’?”

Drew smiled and waved his hand toward the door, and then he said, “Hello….”

“Are you kidding me?” The Respiratory therapist about fell over. “He could barely move his arms, and there was no way he could talk a week ago, and now look at him!”

For the next several minutes, Drew met someone who took care of him while he slept, and the therapist left flabbergasted. Earlier in the afternoon, one of the ICU doctors who saw Drew on his second day in the ICU stopped by, and she left in tears as he talked to her. As we shared all of the progress Drew had made, the doctor hugged Dawn and they cried for a few minutes together.

Neuro Floor, Day #7 (Thursday, August 24th) — 56 days since onset

11:00 AM: Drew stood up for the first time! In fact, he practiced standing 6 times as he got into and out of a wheel chair twice. Toward the end of his physical and occupational therapy treatment this morning, the therapists put together a reclining wheelchair for him to use. He stood again with both therapists and pivoted to the wheelchair to return to his room, and then back to his bed, but it took max assist from both of the therapists. During his therapy sessions, he also practiced sitting up on the edge of the bed several times.

5:00 PM: This afternoon Drew practiced writing letters and words on a dry-erase board with his sister’s assistance. He still has trouble reading small letters and his handwriting is difficult to read because he still has some ataxia and weakness in his hand, but he was getting better at reading words after his sister would write them out. Unfortunately, he worked so hard on his reading and writing, his afternoon Speech and Music Therapy treatments were kind of a disaster because he was so tired and mentally drained. As he gets tired, his response time slows and his words become more slurred and delayed. He did have about 5 seizures today, but overall had a good day and he continues to work on his memory and talking.

We felt bad missing another family function today — our neice got married in Utah County today, but it just rips our heart out to go to a family function with Drew in the hospital. Our family is not complete, so it is difficult to celebrate or leave him behind. We hope they understand and know that we will congratulate them in person, and with our whole family, in a few weeks.

8:30 PM: “Dad, where’s my phone?” Drew asked.

“It’s on the table next to your bed,” I said.

“Dad, can you give me my phone?”

I handed him the phone, and he studied it for a couple of minutes, trying to swipe the screen and struggling to read any of the numbers or letters. Finally, he held the phone back out to me and asked, “Dad, can you dial M❤️❤️❤️❤️’s number for me?”

I searched his contacts and dialed the number, and then I helped him lift his arm so he could hold the phone to his ear. Even though he has been moving his hands and elbows, his shoulders are still very weak, especially his left arm.

I smiled as he talked to his girlfriend about the first couple of days of school and choir, because school started two days ago. She patiently described to him what he was missing, and that he was missed.

Also, a couple more nurses and staff from the ICU stopped by after shift change this evening to see for themselves how well Drew was doing. They could hardly believe it was the same boy.

Working hard in therapy and getting encouragement from a four-legged therapist.

Neuro Floor, Day #8 (Friday, August 25th) — 57 days since onset

7:00 AM: Unfortunately, Drew pulled out his feeding tube this morning. The nurses spent 45 minutes getting a new one inserted. Once they finished, Drew was talking up a storm.

“Did I start school yesterday? What time is it?” Drew asked me.

“There’s a clock on the wall,” I pointed. “Can you tell me what time it is?”

“I can’t see the numbers,” he said.

“Well, it is a few minutes past 7:00 in the morning.”

“I’ve got seminary at 6:00,” Drew said with an alarmed look on his face. “Then I’ve got Drama, and Choir, and BC Calculus,…”

For the next little while, Drew was remembering his class schedule and talking all about A-days and B-days and how much he wished he could be at school. One of the big concerns that he kept mentioning was the auditions for the school musical coming up next week on Monday and Tuesday. He is convinced he will be there, and he plans to call his friends to sign him up for a slot.

5:30 PM: One of the nice features of being able to get up to a wheelchair is that it has wheels. After he finished his afternoon Speech and Music Therapy session, the nurse agreed to accompany us on a walk to go to the outdoor garden on the third floor. Because of Drew’s tracheostomy, the nurse must accompany us with a bag full of emergency items in case Drew’s tracheostomy falls out or becomes clogged. We sat for nearly 30 minutes in the shade of the patio garden, looking at the various statues and potted plants. The whole time Drew was nervously looking at his phone as he had asked me to send some text messages to some of his friends. He was having a hard time patiently waiting for their response and wanted me to send the messages again.

On our way back into the hospital, I noticed Drew was struggling to breathe. “Drew, are you OK?”

His face was bright red and he was making a strange sound from his throat as he gasped and struggled to take in a breathe. The nurse had a look of alarm cross her face and called Respiratory Therapy on her walkie talkie badge as we raced down the hallway back to his room.

Once in his room, the nurse grabbed the suction from the wall and started to try and help remove whatever was blocking his airway, but was having little success. I helped the nurse by hooking up the pulse oximeter to his finger while she worked on his tracheostomy.

“Fortunately,” I noted, “his Oxygen is good at 93%.”

Still, he was gasping and trying to cough something out of his airway. Respiratory Therapy made it to the room and they are able to suction a little deeper, but he also had little success.

“What I think may have happened,” the Respiratory Therapist said, “is that he has been on the speaking valve a little too long today and the lack of humidity with the valve and the outside air has dried out his secretions to the point that he cannot clear them.”

The Respiratory Therapist pulled off the speaking valve and flakes of dried secretions came falling out, but Drew still worked to clear something out of his airway. The Respiratory Therapist placed Drew back on the tracheostomy breathing mask, which gives him humidified oxygen to breathe. “Let’s have him breathe with his mask for a while and moisten back up his airway.”

I then helped the nurse to stand Drew and pivot him back to the bed as he looked extremely pale. We laid him down and positioned him, and fortunately all of his vitals looked good. It took about 30 minutes on the humidified oxygen for his secretions to moisten enough for Drew to finally cough them out.

8:00 PM: Drew’s seizures continue to be well-controlled, with only 4 to 8 seizures per day this past week, although one day he only had 2 seizures. They have all been partial seizures affecting primarily his eyes, mouth, and twitching of his hands or shoulders. One of the new doctors told me that the way one of the Neurologists described Drew’s brain waves on the EEG had been that he was having “seizures on top of his seizures,” and now the anti-seizure cocktail seems to finally have brought them under control.

9:00 PM: “I don’t know if you remember me,” the new Respiratory Therapist said as he entered Drew’s room and started writing his name on our dry erase board. “I took care of Drew a couple of weeks ago in the ICU, and I will be taking care of him again tonight.”

Drew smiled and waved at the therapist. “Hi, I’m Drew.”

“Wow,” the therapist smiled. “So what they are saying really is true. The ICU staff started calling him the “miracle boy,” and I wouldn’t have believed him to be the same boy I cared for in the ICU unless I saw it with my own eyes.”

I never could understand why the Case Managers were researching long-term care facilities to place Drew into after the hospital. In my mind there was no doubt he would be going to rehab and walking out of the hospital, so it was frustrating early on in the process when they would ask us to choose a facility for him. Whether it was our conversations with other FIRES families, or simply our belief in Drew’s motivation and strength, we knew he would “wake up” once the seizures subsided, and although he still has a lot of hard work ahead of him, he has come back to us.

 

family, FIRES

It All Started With A Fever, Part 17

The Acute Phase: A Slow Awakening

The Social Worker at Primary Children’s Hospital told us that writing in a journal can be therapeutic. Even more, perhaps sharing our journey these past few weeks may help other families with children who suffer from this rare, devastating syndrome (F.I.R.E.S. = Febrile Infection-Related Epileptic Syndrome) or other chronic conditions.

There is an interesting verse in the Book of Mormon towards the end of the ‘war chapters’ that I reflect upon as Drew’s illness continues to stretch onward seemingly without end. The verse is found in Alma 62:41 and reads:

“But behold, because of the exceedingly great length of the war between the Nephites and the Lamanites many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility.”

First of all, you know this must have been a really long war because twice in one sentence, he described its length as “exceedingly great.” Second, we can learn that trials will fall upon all of us at some point in our lives, and we have a choice how we respond to those trials. Unfortunately, sometimes people can become frustrated and bitter as the tribulations seem to stretch on, and they choose to become “hardened.” On the other hand, our trial with Drew’s illness has had the opposite effect on our family. Despite the emotional roller coaster, we have seen the hand of the Lord bless our family and Drew so very many times.

ICU Day #48 (Wednesday, August 16th)

9:30 AM: Drew had a mostly quiet night last night, but every time they rolled him or changed his position in bed, his oxygen would drop into the 70’s and 80’s, and they had to suction him and watch him close until it came back up above 90%. The ENT surgeons just finished  changing out his tracheostomy to a new one and they said everything looks good. The ICU doctors were talking in rounds that now his tracheostomy has been switched out, they plan to transfer Drew out of the ICU tomorrow if everything continues to be stable. He seems to be having slightly fewer seizures, but still not all the way alert. Some of the medication changes seem to be helping slow down the seizures, so hopefully we’ll continue to see some improvement as they continue to adjust things.

8:30 PM: Drew has been really sleepy today. He was more awake late morning per Dawn and Erin, and he seems to have been a little more responsive. However, most importantly, he does not seem to be having as many seizures — it is hard to quantify, but I would guess he is averaging closer to 8 to 10 per hour now instead of 10 to 12.

Gotta love those cheeks.

ICU Day #49 (Thursday, August 17th)

10:00 AM: ICU just finished rounding and they still plan to transfer out of ICU this evening after the 4:00 Care Conference. He is getting Music Therapy right now and is smiling. He has periods where he seems to be tracking with his eyes, but still times with lots of focal seizures. We had another cluster of seizures again from 4:00 to 5:15 this morning, not the GTC, but lots of focal seizures that seemed to be continuous. The doctors decided to give him some Ativan to help break the cycle, and the seizures stopped within about 10 minutes. He seems to be doing good right now but limited motor control still.

5:00 PM: We just finished Drew’s care conference and everything went well. However, Drew won’t be transferred out of the ICU until tomorrow morning. There is a patient still in the room that they want to move Drew to and that patient is supposed to go home later tonight. The bigger news is that Drew was the most awake and alert this afternoon than he has been since we came to the hospital, and he has been trying to “talk” to us by mouthing some words, although he is still sleepy and incredibly weak. So just a heads up that Drew won’t be out of the ICU until tomorrow, and I can send a text out when we finally move to his new room.

9:30 PM: Word is getting around the ICU that Drew is scheduled to leave tomorrow.

“So I heard you might be leaving tomorrow?” One of the nurses who had Drew a couple of nights this week came into his room. Drew saw her approaching his bed and watched as she walked over and stood next to the head of his bed.

“Yes, we’re moving on up tomorrow,” I said. “Although I heard our view won’t be as good.”

“Depends on the room…,” his nurse said. The whole time she stood there, Drew was studying her face and seemed to be looking at her like she looked familiar.

I leaned in closer to Drew and whispered in his ear, “That is your nurse from Wednesday night. She took really good care of you. Can you tell here thank you?”

As he peered intently at her face, Drew mouthed the words, “th-thank y-you.”

As tears welled up in her eyes, the nurse said, “Well that just made my day.”

11:30 PM: Drew just picked his right hand up and moved it all the way to his chin. I jumped out of my chair in alarm that he was going to grab one of his tubes and pull it out. He was frustrated as he tried to reach his fingers for something on his face, so I boosted his elbow a little bit and then I realized he was trying to itch the tape on his cheek that is holding his feeding tube in place. Then I realized he probably doesn’t even know it was here or what it is, so I pulled up a chair next to his bed and I sat down and explained all the tubes and stickers on his face and chest in hopes that he wouldn’t try to pull them off.

Elder Dallin H. Oaks explained that we choose how we will be affected by adversity:
“Surely these great adversities are not without some eternal purpose or effect. They can turn our hearts to God. … Even as adversities inflict mortal hardships, they can also be the means of leading men and women to eternal blessings.
“Such large-scale adversities as natural disasters and wars seem to be inherent in the mortal experience. We cannot entirely prevent them, but we can determine how we will react to them.”

As we count our many blessings and focus on how far Drew has come since those first, few dark days of his illness, we realize how much we need the Lord and our dependence on him for all that we have. We are so grateful that Drew is finally starting to get better and the seizures are subsiding.

Neuro Floor Day #1 (Friday, August 18th)

1:00 PM: He’s been really sleepy all morning because he was awake most of the night. I told him several times to try and close his eyes and go to sleep, but he didn’t fall asleep until about 4:30 this morning. He hasn’t missed much as his mother and I have been packing up his stuff and waiting for his move out of the ICU.

3:10 PM: Goodbye, ICU. Hello, Neuro Floor! Drew officially made it out of the ICU for the first time in 7 weeks!

Goodbye, ICU!

Neuro Floor Day #2 (Saturday, August 19th)

8:00 AM: Drew finally fell back asleep. He woke up about 5:00 this morning and was trying to tell us something, but we couldn’t understand what he was saying other than the number three and holding up three fingers. I am sure it is frustrating for him as he struggles to talk to us.

12:45 PM: Bath time! One of the perks of being on the Neuro Floor is the hydrotherapy room, which includes a bathtub that has the ability to bathe patients such as Drew. We helped the nurses slide him onto a stretcher, and then we rolled him down to the hydro room and placed him over the tub. The bathtub actually raises up off of the floor and the water rises up and over the gurney. Unfortunately, Drew slept through almost the entire bath until right when we got him back to bed.

I have to chuckle because Drew reminds me a little bit of Westley from the Princess Bride when he wakes up from being “mostly dead.” Drew is so weak, he needs help moving his head, arms, and legs, but he is slowly getting stronger again. After being in a coma for most of the past 7 weeks, he is also quite sleepy much of the day and night, and the doctors tell us it will take time for him to recover.

6:30 PM: Hair cut time! His aunt was very kind and came up to the hospital this afternoon to try and cut Drew’s hair for the first time in over 2 months. We had to move him into the cardiac chair again and raise him up so that she could better cut his hair, but even then, I had to help him hold his head forward so she could use the clippers on the back and sides. We may have tried to squeeze a little bit too much into one day as he started to have a seizure mid-hair cut. His wonderful aunt hurried as quick as she could and finished just in time so that we could get him back to bed before he had more seizures. He was really tired and so were the rest of us, but he looks pretty handsome now!

Here is the clip from the Princess Bride. I feel a lot like Fezzik every time we see Drew start to move again.

family, FIRES

It All Started With A Fever, Part 16

The Acute Phase: First Rays of Light

The Social Worker at Primary Children’s Hospital told us that writing in a journal can be therapeutic. Even more, perhaps sharing our journey these past few weeks may help other families with children who suffer from this rare, devastating syndrome (F.I.R.E.S. = Febrile Infection-Related Epileptic Syndrome) or other chronic conditions.

ICU Day #43 (Friday, August 11th)

6:00 AM: Drew seems to be about the same this morning, meaning nearly-continuous Focal seizures affecting primarily his eyes and mouth. In fact, he had seizures most of the night even though they gave him Ativan twice to try and stop them. His heart rate has been over 100 and he has been hyperventilating despite the doctors turning the ventilator settings down twice. He is essentially breathing over the ventilator settings. Strange thing is last night he finally went into ketosis from the Ketogenic diet, which means it may finally start to work. The nurse gave Drew all of his oral medications through his feeding tube a little early this morning, and then she had to turn off the feeding tube just now in preparation for the surgery later today.

10:00 AM: Drew squeezed the Neurology doctor’s  hand on command! The doctor actually tried once without success at the beginning of his examination, but Drew was mid-seizure. A few minutes later, the Neurology Fellow saw Drew break out of his seizure and told the attending Neurology doctor to try again when Drew was more awake. Sure enough — Drew was able to squeeze the doctor’s hand. His left hand is stronger than his right hand at this point. The Neurology attending doctor also said Drew’s EEG looks better than last week, but obviously still has a ways to go.

Before the Neurology doctors finished their rounds, I asked, “So now that the Ketogenic diet finally started to kick in, how long will it take until we see the diet possibly decrease his seizure activity?”

“For smaller children, it usually takes 2 or 3 days,” the Neurology Dietitian explained, “but for adults and teens as big as Drew, it may take up to a week to really have an impact.”

11:30 AM: Dawn cannot sit — she nervously paces the room back and forth while wringing her hands. We watch the nurses and respiratory therapists connect Drew to portable machines and monitors that they will use as they transport him down the hall from the ICU to the operating room. When we arrive in the holding area, the surgeons and anesthesiologist review the procedure and make final preparations. Finally, as they push Drew’s bed away toward the operating room, the nurse escorts Dawn and me to the exit, telling us to go grab lunch and be back to Drew’s room in about an hour.

2:15 PM: Dawn barely touched her lunch. Some neighbors kindly brought us fried chicken and we sat and visited with them while we ate, although Dawn was visibly shaking with worry throughout the meal. We returned to Drew’s room a bit after 1:00, and a short while later the surgeon came and told us everything went very well. Finally, the rest of the nurses and respiratory therapists rolled Drew back into his ICU room about 30 minutes ago, and we sat and listened as the surgeons and anesthesiologists reported back to the ICU doctors the procedure, interventions, and orders. The doctors didn’t want to pull the breathing tube out of his mouth until after he returned to his ICU room. Once they had Drew hooked back up to the machines and monitors in his room, they pulled his breathing tube out of his mouth. At the base of his throat, the shiny, white tracheostomy tube protrudes about a half inch, surrounded by a white cuff and secured with a soft-tie collar around his neck. Despite the commotion and noise, Drew is still quite sleepy from the anesthesia and he appears the most restful since he came out of the Pentobarbital coma. I wish his mother could feel so restful, but at least she appears somewhat relieved that the surgery is finished and all went well (and honestly, I felt the same anxiousness on the inside even though I might not have showed it on the outside).

11:00 PM: Drew has been doing a little better tonight. He has slowly been moving his arms and hands a tiny bit and trying to follow more with his eyes in between seizures. A big change this evening is that now that the breathing tube is gone from his mouth, he has started to make some facial expressions, but the facial expressions tonight have been more sorrowful as it appears he has been having some pain from his surgery. With the lights dimmed, I have been sitting at his bedside, holding his hand, and we are listening to the Lord of the Rings soundtrack until some pain medicine kicks in. Overall, seems like we saw some positive changes today.

Drew ready for CHHS Homecoming 2016.

ICU Day #44 (Saturday, August 12th)

12:30 AM: Well, he just threw up a little bit of blood and Ketogenic diet about an hour ago — not a lot, just a little bit. However, the remarkable thing was that he knew it was coming and he tried as hard as he could to turn all the way over onto his right side. He lifted his left arm way up off of his body and seemed to be reaching for the bed rail and trying to turn his trunk when he moved just enough in time for the emesis. We got him cleaned up and the nurse suctioned his mouth and throat. I have to chuckle as he glides his tongue around his mouth and along his teeth, and at one point, I thought it looked like he might be trying to talk, but of course he couldn’t and I tried to explain to him why. Starting to run a little temp despite the Motrin and Tylenol, so we’re going to use some ice packs to help cool him down.

8:00 AM: The Neurology resident came by for pre-rounding and I asked her about Drew’s eyes and the difficulty he is having tracking or looking at anything. She said it is because he is still having focal seizures, and when they occur in the frontal lobes of the brain, his eyes will deviate up and away from the side having the seizure. So some evidence that there are still some seizures going on at least sub-clinically. She also said that the plan is to leave the EEG off until tomorrow afternoon, so we can go ahead and wash his hair today.

10:15 AM: As I sat next to his bedside, Drew’s eyelids flew open and his eyes rolled upward and started to shake rapidly back and forth. This was followed by his mouth twisting and twitching, and rapidly his whole body started to convulse and shake up and down on the bed. He hadn’t had a General Tonic-Clonic seizure (formerly known as Grand Mal seizures) for a few weeks now. I hollered for the nurse and he came running into the room. Luckily, the GTC seizure only lasted about 45 seconds.

11:05 AM: Unfortunately we have not yet washed Drew’s hair because he proceeded to have a cluster of five GTC seizures about every 10 minutes apart, but they were able to rush and get him some Ativan just as the 5th one started, and it seems to have finally broken the cycle. The doctors ordered a check on his Phenobarbital level, and they also said that they may give him some pain medicine, as both of those may have lowered his seizure threshold. The ICU doctors just finished rounding, and they are going to do breathing trials (taking Drew off the ventilator, or breathing machine, and having him breathe on his own) every 6 hours — the first one started early this morning and he did very well. Again, if we can just get the seizures to stop, I think he would be doing awesome.

2:30 PMDrew just “talked” to Dawn. I was helping the nurse to re-position Drew In his bed and I noticed he was looking at me most of the time. So Dawn came around the bed to talk to him, and he got this scowl on his face.

“Are you angry, Drew?” Dawn asked.

As we watched him, it appeared that Drew mouthed the word, “yes.” With tracheostomy, he can’t actually speak, but it sure looked like he moved his lips and tried to say something.

“Did he just say ‘yes’?” Dawn turned to see if we had been watching.

Drew’s sister and I nodded, and she said, “Yeah, it looks like he just said ‘yes.'”

Now the nurse was watching as he worked on the IV tubing.

Dawn leaned in closer and asked, “Drew, are  you hurting? Do you need some pain medicine?”

As everyone in the room watched, Drew nodded his head and clearly mouthed the word “Yes” again.

“That works for me,” his nurse said.

Drew’s sister started jumping up and down, shouting and pumping her fist in the air as tears streamed down her cheeks. Dawn and I started hugging each other as we shook our heads in disbelief. For the first time in more than 5 weeks, Drew had finally been able to say something to us!

6:00 PM: Kind of a busy afternoon. After Drew got some pain medicine, his mom and sister washed his hair and tried to get all the EEG glue out of it. We had been nervous with the new tracheostomy to not get any water near his surgery site, but the nurse helped them to tip the bed down and use a basin to catch the water.

Since Drew seemed to be a little more awake today, his mother thought it might be good to let his girlfriend see him for the first time since he had been admitted to the ICU 6 weeks ago.

“When you and I were dating, back before we were married,” his mother said. “If you had been sick in the hospital, I would have worried myself sick, and it would have meant a lot to me to be able to visit you and see you. If we can wash his hair, I think the visit might be good for both of them.”

M❤️❤️❤️❤️ and her parents were planning to visit Drew this afternoon, so I texted her, “If you would like, I could take you to see Drew in the ICU today?”

She replied almost immediately, “I would love to see him. Thank you.”

Once she arrived with her parents, I walked M❤️❤️❤️❤️ back into the ICU as Drew’s mother and sister walked out. At first, the many monitors and tubes and machines appeared to intimidate and overwhelm her, so I explained them to her and tried to help allay her fears.

As she tentatively approached the bed, she put on some latex gloves and then grabbed Drew’s hand. I pulled up a chair behind her and helped her to sit down next to his bed.

“Let me know when you’re ready to leave, and I will help you find your way out of the ICU.” She nodded without looking away from Drew.

Two and a half hours later, she reluctantly let go of his hand and I helped her find her way back to her parents who were waiting upstairs in the McDonald’s room with the rest of our family.

Drew’s mother and older sister washing his hair.

ICU Day #45 (Sunday, August 13th)

4:15 AM: I awoke to the sound of the nurse calling the ICU doctor on her Vocera communication device, “Drew just had another General Tonic-Clonic seizure that lasted about 40 seconds.”

5:05 AM: I sat and watched as Drew had another cluster of 4 GTC seizures about every 10 minutes apart again, each lasting less than 45 seconds. The nurse was able to give him 2 mg of Ativan and it broke the cycle.

8:30 AM: The Neurology doctors plan to adjust some of Drew’s anti-seizure medicines and he continues to have 1+ ketones in his urine, so they are hopeful something can cut the seizures and control them better. For now, the doctors plan to tweak the doses and keep Drew on the 7 anti-seizure medicines he is currently taking: Onfi, Vimpat, Perampanel, Phenobarbital, CBD oil, Anakinra, and Topirimate, as well as the Ketogenic diet.

10:30 AM: The Respiratory therapists had to put Drew back on the ventilator. He was working too hard and his heart rate wouldn’t come down. He actually went about 24 hours with just an oxygen mask over his tracheostomy and was breathing on his own, but he definitely needs a break now. Hopefully he can calm down and not seize quite as much. One positive note is that the ICU doctors decided to remove Drew’s PICC line and convert the last of his medications to oral form through his feeding tube. He now only has one IV left for emergency medications, such as the Ativan.

6:30 PM: So after talking to us yesterday, it seems like overall Drew had a step backward today. He had another cluster of 8 GTC seizures from 1:45 to 2:35 this afternoon, and his heart rate has been really high all day. The doctors decided to put him back on the ventilator to help him not work so hard, and they have been giving him Ativan and a bolus of phenobarbital to try and stop his seizures. The doctors put the EEG back on for an hour this afternoon, and he was having Focal seizures the entire time. The doctors also plan to give Drew some pain medicine for his tracheostomy because it still seems really sensitive whenever the nurses have to suction his secretions. Pain and fatigue can lower the seizure threshold, and he certainly seems to be fatigued and in pain this evening.

11:00 PM: Drew has been a lot more comfortable with the pain pill on board and is not agitated or twitching his hands or mouth as much. For a while he was kind of awake and not seizing and listening to me tell him about some of the cousins and about church today. I then told him he was having seizures because of the virus he had, and now the virus is gone, the doctors are trying to get the seizures to stop, so none of this was his fault. It might have been my imagination, but it looked like he then mouthed the words, “I know.” A few minutes later he fell asleep. More and more it seems that the tracheostomy was really bothering him today.

ICU Day #46 (Monday, August 14th)

8:00 PM: Kind of neutral day today for Drew — not really much changing. On a positive note, he had no more General Tonic Clonic seizures today after the doctors made a couple of adjustments to his medicines, but he continues to have a lot of Focal seizures which make his mouth and eyes kind of hard to control. They gave him some pain medicine again this morning, and so he has been less agitated today and more comfortable, but that also meant less movement. Finally this evening, he seems to be looking with his eyes and listening to us talk a little more again. Hopefully the medicines will continue to diminish the seizures more and more each day. His feeding tube clogged this evening and it took them three tries to get it replaced, but it was critical because all of his medications are now given through the feeding tube.

Preparing and serving lunch in the McDonalds room.

ICU Day #47 (Tuesday, August 15th)

7:30 AM: Drew actually looks peaceful as he sleeps. The nurse said Drew had a much better night and last night was the first night she hadn’t needed to tape his eyelids shut because he seemed to have fewer seizures. He really looks like he is just sleeping right now. For a minute, I thought he looked like the old Drew again, just with longer hair and a scruffy beard.

2:00 PM: Some of the Young Women and their leaders from our church came up to the hospital and prepared and served lunch in the McDonald’s room. I was at work and unable to attend, but the rest of the family said it was delicious and a wonderful break from the hospital cafeteria.

Dawn and the Young Women leaders

9:00 PM: Another kind of neutral day for Drew. No GTC seizures and overall it seems he has had fewer focal seizures, but still several per hour. The medications appear to be cutting down on the seizures but he may be a little too sedated as a result. There were times during the day where he seemed to be able to follow with his eyes a little bit, but he has struggled to follow any commands. He really hasn’t mouthed any more words to us the last 2 days. So kind of a mixed bag, but so long as the seizures continue to abate and be more controlled, we hope that Drew will have longer stretches of alertness and start to be able to move and recover.

Dawn hugging and thanking a few of the Young Women.

family, FIRES

It All Started With A Fever, Part 15

The Acute Phase: The Darkness Before the Dawn

The Social Worker at Primary Children’s Hospital told us that writing in a journal can be therapeutic. Even more, perhaps sharing our journey these past few weeks may help other families with children who suffer from this rare, devastating syndrome (F.I.R.E.S. = Febrile Infection-Related Epileptic Syndrome).

ICU Day #40 (Tuesday, August 8th) — A Decent Day

4:30 AM: The nurse just finished giving Drew his second round of Anakinra shots (4 shots each time). I held his hand because the shots seem to be pretty painful and sting even though they are only subcutaneous injections. The first shot, Drew didn’t really flinch, because I think he was sleeping, but then he woke up and the last 3 shots he was moving his left arm and hand quite a bit, reacting and trying to withdraw from the pain. Respiratory Therapy had to come re-tape his breathing tube again a couple of hours ago, and it looks better now. It is strange to think that this 12-inch, plastic tube dips all the way down into Drew’s lungs to help him breath, and the primary anchor is simply a couple of long pieces of tape along Drew’s upper lip and  cheeks. It is no wonder they need to re-secure the tape every few days.

10:00 AM: ICU and Neurology doctors both finished rounding, and they agreed starting today to try the Ketogenic diet one more time. The Ketogenic diet is high fat, low carb and low protein, but for reasons unknown, about 1/3 of kids on this diet see a 50% reduction in their number of seizures. For Drew, he will be on a ratio of 4.5 fats for every 1 carbohydrate and protein combined (it is all liquid in his feeding tube anyway). However, because he has developed a pressure sore on his sacrum (the bottom of his back), they are only going to try for 7 days and if the diet doesn’t kick in and help, they will switch him back to a regular diet to get more protein and heal his pressure sore more quickly. At this point, the concern to stop the seizures outweighs the concern over the pressure sore, and they will try to keep Drew on his sides more than his back to keep pressure off his wound.

One other development is that it looks like he got a little too much phenobarbital yesterday, so Drew may be really sleepy most of the day today. His phenobarbital level this morning was 93, which is pretty high. They were hoping to get him between 60 and 70 the next couple of days while the Anakinra shots had a chance to take effect, but they overshot a little and will have to hold his phenobarbital dose for today. His blood pressure and breathing and labs are all good this morning. In fact, he just looks like he is resting peacefully for the first time since coming out of the last Pentobarbital coma. The Respiratory Therapists are even giving him a break from the bite block to let his lips get a rest. The Neurology doctors also said as they were looking at his EEG from yesterday morning, they were hesitantly optimistic and the EEG seems to look pretty good today so far, but it could be the phenobarbital overdose. To their credit, the Neurology doctors seem to be a little more positive in their assessments and recommendations.

3:30 PM: Occupational therapy worked with Drew this afternoon, and because of his pressure sore on his sacrum, she wasn’t able to get him up to the cardiac chair again, but she did stretch both of his arms. Interestingly, when the therapist was stretching his right arm above his head, he actively tried to push it down she said. And then later today he was feeling the breathing tube with his tongue then reached up his right hand to his chest. It is nice to see that he is starting to move his arms and hands a tiny bit more today.

Christmas Eve, 2015

ICU Day #41 (Wednesday, August 9th) — A Not-so-decent Day

8:00 AM: Drew seems about the same this morning. I helped the nurses roll him and reposition him at 2:00 AM and 7:30 AM, and I got a good look at the wound on his sacrum. I can see why they are worried because there is one spot that the Wound Nurses said may go all the way to his bone. Each time we rolled Drew and changed his position in bed, the nurses carefully cleaned the wound and applied new bandages. He also has small pressure sores starting to develop at the base of his left toe and along the crest of his left shoulder blade, so they put bandages on those spots as well.

He has been moving his arms and hands a little bit more today, but not on command and he still can’t really follow any directions. I also woke up and helped comfort Drew while the nurses gave him his Anakinra shots at 4:00 AM. Reading the numbers again on that study about the Anakinra and they are a little misleading about the response rate, but the Rheumatology doctor said that given the significant seizure activity Drew has been having, they thought it would take at least 3 to 5 days on the Anakinra to hopefully start seeing some improvement.

4:00 PM: After a lot of thought, research, discussion, and prayer, we have agreed to proceed with tracheostomy surgery for Drew. He will have been intubated 5 weeks tomorrow, and it looks like he will need ventilator support for at least another 2 weeks or more. For pediatric patients, they really don’t like going beyond a month with the breathing tube in their mouth and they try to switch them to a tracheostomy so the breathing tube comes out of the base of their throat. As we watch him have seizure after seizure, he continues to chew and gnaw on the breathing tube and is causing sores on his lips. We are also worried about the impact on his teeth, tongue, and vocal cords as the plastic breathing tube rubs and irritates and starts to cause inflammation and damage. After reading up on it and discussing it, Dawn and I agreed that it will be best to have the surgery and switch him to the tracheostomy as he continues to battle these seizures. However, Drew’s brother and sisters are not entirely convinced yet and are a little worried about seeing their brother with a tube sticking out of his throat.

6:00 PM:This afternoon, he really seems to be having a ton more seizures, most likely as his Phenobarbital levels come back down into a safer range. The nurses gave him Ativan twice this afternoon to try and break up some myoclonic-type seizures, and they seemed to work temporarily, but only after a delayed response (one shot took 45 minutes before it seemed his seizures slowed down). His EEG has remained about the same since Monday, with usually 10 to 12 bursts per screen interspersed between frequent seizures every 5 to 10 minutes. He hasn’t been able to track with his eyes much at all today. On a positive note, they should have the CBD oil here tomorrow to start with Drew. We are just barely 49 hours into the Anakinra, but we’re sure hoping it will have an effect soon, because so far it doesn’t seem to be making a dent in the seizures.

7:00 PM: Drew 2, Nurses 0. He just peed all over his nurse twice. At first, he was peeing past the Foley catheter — weird because he still had the catheter, but he was peeing around it. So she took the catheter out because the doctors wanted to discontinue it anyway, and a couple of minutes later, we were surprised when Niagara Falls broke loose all over the poor nurse’s scrubs. In seriousness, this is the first time his bladder has been able to relax enough to urinate since he first arrived at the hospital over 5 weeks ago, so we’re hoping this is a really good sign that his body is slowly returning to normal.

10:00 PM: So even though his EEG is still a mess, and he has had a lot more seizure activity today, Drew has been reacting and moving the most tonight than he has all day. Just now as we turned him onto his right side, we tried to cross his left leg over, and he slowly pulled it back straight — his leg!! He also moved his right arm twice to cover his abdomen as his nurse was trying to give him his Lovenox shot (for blood clots). He seemed to scowl at the nurse when she washed his face. The nurse also noticed he has been flaring his nostrils and seems to be moving his eyebrows more. Hoping and praying for more tomorrow, but a few more little victories tonight after a long, hard day full of seizures.

11:00 PM: I just finished putting lotion on Drew’s hands and feet, and talking to him the whole time. He had one big seizure for sure, but the rest of the time he seemed very calm and quiet, and I swear a couple of times he tried to squeeze my fingers when I asked him. I told him good night and gave him a kiss on his forehead.

Ugly EEG screen during one of Drew’s seizures.

ICU Day #42 (Thursday, August 10th) — A Bad Day

8:30 AM: Drew’s EEG looks pretty bad this morning. As I look at him in bed, he seems to be sleeping and all the seizure activity would seem to be sub-clinical and not readily apparent. However, the Neurology team has a doctor who remotely monitors all of the EEG patterns around the clock, and Drew’s EEG was bad enough this morning that the Neurology doctor telephoned in to the nurses and ordered a 4 mg dose of Ativan this morning to try and quiet his EEG activity down.

1:30 PM: Drew loves Music Therapy. Today was the third day that the therapist came to his bedside with her guitar and she gently sang to him. You can tell he enjoys it because his heart rate and breathing will slow down, and during the session today, it seemed to be the first time he has rested all day with all of his seizures.

3:30 PM: “This is so stupid,” Drew’s brother says as he reads through the research article on the Anakinra. “Why is it not working on Drew?”

“I think it is working, but we need to give it more time,” I try to calm him down.

“It’s been three days now, so why is it not working?”

“You have to remember how bad his seizures have been and they said it will take a little longer than the girl in the case study,” I answered. “She was only having about 6 to 8 seizures per DAY, while Drew has been having at least 6 to 8 seizures per HOUR.”

“Well, it’s stupid that it is taking so long,” his brother answered. “The Sage 547 — it’s supposed to work on 77% of patients, but it didn’t on Drew. Ketogenic diet — supposed to help decrease 50% of the seizures, but not on Drew. All this plasmapheresis and medicines — nothing is working on Drew. Why is nothing working? Why is he not getting better?”

“He is getting better, but they just need more time,” I tried to reassure him. “We all want Drew to get better, and he will. You need to hang in there just as much as Drew.”

He just shook his head and threw the research article back down on the bedside table. “I don’t think I want to go to the Family Conference this afternoon,” Drew’s brother said. “I’m not in the mood.”

I turned and looked him in the eye, “Of anyone in the family right now, you need the Family Conference meeting the most, and you need to be there.”

5:30 PM: We just finished the Family Conference with the Rainbow Kids Team at Primary Children’s Hospital. They help families to cope with illness and prolonged hospitalizations, and the last several days the team of doctors, social workers, nurses, and chaplains have been visiting our family and helping us. They suggested the conference prior to Drew’s tracheostomy surgery, and I quickly agreed as the family certainly needed to talk through some of our feelings and worries.

For most of the conference, Drew’s brother and sisters sat silently contemplating the comments and feelings being expressed mostly by Dawn and myself. I tried to be quiet and give them a chance to answer as much as I could, but I couldn’t help it with what was probably the hardest question.

“What is the one thing you fear most about Drew’s illness?” One of the Rainbow Team members asked.

Silence. I sat there patiently waiting for someone to speak until I could not take it any more, so I answered, “I hope it is OK, but I think as we have been talking as a family that the biggest fear we have is that Drew will never come back to us… that he will never get better and never be the same again….”

The Rainbow Team looked at each of the family and asked, “Is this how you feel also?”

The kids each nodded yes, but Dawn added with tears in her eyes, “One of the most frustrating thing about all of this is that nobody can tell us if he will get better or not. Nobody knows how much he will recover. It’s just a big guessing game, and it’s frustrating.”

“That can be a hard thing — the unknown,” the Rainbow Team Fellow said. Silence settled again around the table as everyone reflected on this hard thing, but I felt instead that we did know some of the possible outcomes.

“I think we do have a little better idea now than we did six weeks ago,” I said. “At the very least, Drew comes home to us just like he is now. He might always have seizures and never be able to walk or talk again, but we would still love him and care for him and help him to be as happy as possible. However, I am not yet ready in the slightest to give up hope that these new medicines and treatments will have an impact on his seizures. I believe he will make some more improvement, and even if he is not exactly the same as before, at least we will still have him with us.”

8:30 PM: I asked Alex to help me anoint Drew and give him a blessing ahead of his tracheostomy surgery that is scheduled for tomorrow at Noon.

11:00 PM: Despite my enthusiastic speech in the Family Conference this afternoon, a feeling of dread has enveloped me. All of the frustrations and fears have descended upon me like a lead weight, and I am having difficulty as I sit and watch his EEG screen tonight. Drew seems to have been a lot worse today, having nearly constant seizures, despite all the new medications. Just tonight, he seems to have had a seizure that lasted for 90 minutes or more, both on his EEG as well as with his eyes and mouth. The ICU doctors rounded just now and agreed to try a shot of Ativan even though they aren’t sure it will help. CBD oil started today and now 72 hours into the Anakinra, but still nothing helping. He is scheduled to have surgery tomorrow at Noon for placement of a tracheostomy, and just in time as he started getting another sore on his lip today. As I lay there on the recliner next to his bed, I listen to the hum of the ventilator, the clicking of his feeding pump, and the many sounds from his SCD pump, the air mattress motor, and the IV machines. But one thing I don’t hear is any sound from Drew, who continues to have seizure after seizure after seizure. I hope something helps soon, but I feel my hope slowly slipping away.

Drew loves movies, and some of his favorites are the Lord of the Rings movies. My favorite of all the great quotes from those movies happens near the end of second movie, The Two Towers, as the two hobbits, Frodo and Sam, despair after narrowly escaping capture by Sauron’s minions. Frodo has been tasked with traveling to Mordor to destroy the One Ring, and Sam is his best friend and trusty companion who volunteered to help him. However, in light of the seemingly impossible quest still stretching out before them, Frodo begins to lose hope…

Frodo: I can’t do this, Sam.
Sam: I know. It’s all wrong. By rights we shouldn’t even be here. But we are. It’s like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn’t want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it’s only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn’t. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something.
Frodo: What are we holding onto, Sam?
Sam: That there’s some good in this world, Mr. Frodo… and it’s worth fighting for.

I suppose that at this very moment, I feel just like Frodo. After all of the dissapointments and hopes and emotions the last few weeks, it seems like we will never get out from under the FIRES shadow. How can our family ever go back to the way it was when so much bad has happened? And do I want to know the end, because what if it isn’t happy? I don’t really think we can turn back with Drew, but it just seems like this darkness will stretch on forever.

family, FIRES

It All Started With A Fever, Part 14

The Acute Phase: Auto-Immune versus Auto-Inflammatory

The Social Worker at Primary Children’s Hospital told us that writing in a journal can be therapeutic. Even more, perhaps sharing our journey these past few weeks may help other families with children who suffer from this rare, devastating disease.

ICU Day #37 (Saturday, August 5th)

7:00 AM: Not much change with Drew overnight, but we have had a few flickers of hope, which means he has started to open his eyes a little bit again. Continues to have frequent seizures (anywhere from 8 to 15 per hour) with a few periods where his eyes are open, but he is unable to follow commands and he has no real recognition of self or his surroundings. He did have a couple of left elbow twitches this morning, some random, spontaneous, muscle twitches, but not consistent or repeatable.

3:00 PM: The fifth plasmapheresis treatment just finished. They are loading him up with some Benadryl and Tylenol in preparation for starting the IVig because it often causes a little bit of a bump in temperature and rash. The doctors also decided to add a fifth anti-seizure medicine named Topirimate in hopes of breaking his seizures, and they are also re-dosing all of his other anti-seizure medicines right now to replenish them in his system after the plasmapheresis washed them out.

Drew and Alex, October 2016

10:30 PM: About 30 minutes ago, Drew had a Grand Mal seizure, which is his first grand mal since the very first week. Ironically, it happened while the ICU doctors were doing evening rounds, so I was standing near the doorway to his room when I saw it start. At first I thought he was reaching his right hand up to pull out his breathing tube, but then I realized it was a big seizure. His head was repeatedly turning to the right side and his right arm was jerking up and down. I hollered at the nurses and doctors, and by the time I ran over to his side, the seizure had stopped, so it lasted less than 20 seconds or so. Initially, I was excited to see some movement, but when I realized it was a Grand Mal seizure, I was worried all over again that things were getting worse, not better.

ICU Day #38 (Sunday, August 6th)

10:30 AM: Drew had another Grand Mal seizure this morning (second in the last 12 hours). The Neurology doctors just finished rounds and told us that despite all the medications and treatments, Drew is still nearly constantly having seizures. They’re going to give him one or two big doses of a sixth seizure medicine that he tried previously called Keppra just to see if it will have an effect. The cannabis oil probably won’t be here until the end of the week. Ketogenic diet probably won’t happen for a while because Drew has developed a pretty significant bed sore on his sacrum, but it’s still on the table once all the doctors feel like his body will handle it. With his constant seizures, his mouth is constantly moving and chewing on the “bite block” in his mouth that protects the breathing tube, and as a result, his bottom lip is starting to bleed. The doctors did agree to try a dose of Ativan to see if they can get his clinical movement to stop, but they told us he is still having the seizures on his EEG. We’re basically in the wait and hope the seizures eventually burn out phase again. It sucks.

2:30 PM: Between church meetings, I called up to the hospital to check on things and they had not been going very well since the Neurology doctors rounded. So I left church early, ran home and grabbed Alex and Ashley, and we headed back up to the hospital to comfort and be together as a family.

When I walked into Drew’s room, his mother sat in a chair next to his bed, gloves on as she held Drew’s hand, and her head was resting on her elbow as she sat and cried. I sat down next to her and put my arm around her, but she barely moved other than her shoulders shaking with her sobs. After several minutes I was able to get her to look at me and I asked, “What is the matter? What did the doctors tell you?”

“The doctor looked me right in the eye and told me there is nothing more he can do for Drew, that is the problem,” she explained as tears streamed down her cheeks.

I pulled her close and tried to comfort her. “Surely there has to be something more. They just need to figure out the anti-seizure cocktail and make sure they have the right combination of medicines, including the right doses and timing of the medications. They’ll keep trying,” I tried to reassure her, but tears were rolling down my face now too. It hurt to watch our son in bed having seizure after seizure, and then to see the hopeless look in Dawn’s eyes — it was almost too much to bear.

Eventually, she was able to calm down enough to leave Drew’s bedside and go for a walk. We found the rest of the children in the cafeteria and sat and talked for a while. Erin had been there for the doctors’ rounds and confirmed it had been a rather pessimistic outlook, but more out of frustration on the doctors’ part because even though they were not sure what more to try, at least they agreed to try the Ativan and Keppra today. At the very least, the doctors asked us to have another Care Conference tomorrow at 11:00 to discuss our next treatment options now that the plasmapheresis and IVig had finished. Although, in the back of my mind I was fearful it was a meeting to weigh some type of hospice, or comfort-care discussion, instead of any other possible treatments because based upon their rounds today, it didn’t sound like there were any other different treatment options to try.

10:00 PM: “Did you see that?” I asked the nurse.

“Not sure — what did you see?” The nurse had been busy working on Drew’s breathing tube.

“When you were trying to adjust Drew’s bite block, he moved his right arm and hand.”

“Are you sure it wasn’t just a seizure?” He has been having lots of seizures, mostly just moving his mouth and eyes, and she had heard in report about the grand mal seizures.

“No,” I shook my head. “I saw his Grand Mal seizure last night, and this was not a seizure. Last night, he was flexing his arm and jerking his head over and over again. Just now, I think he was trying to reach his hand up to his mouth.”

Over the next hour or so, Drew moved his right wrist a couple of times back and forth, as well as his 4th and 5th right fingers, his left wrist once, and his right elbow. Unfortunately, I couldn’t get him to do them on command or repeat them, but I was able to video a little bit of the movements to send to the rest of the family. However, the movements became noticeably less as he fatigued quickly.

http://www.jeffreyolsen.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/IMG_0138.mov

ICU Day #39 (Monday, August 7th)

10:00 AM: Lots of seizures. When he has seizures, his eyes roll up and cannot track anything, and he is unable to move or do anything. Morning medications were a little late because of pharmacy. Funny thing is that Drew is bigger than some adults, but the medicines here are usually packaged in doses for children, toddlers, and infants, so they often have to send up multiple vials or doses to get an adult equivalent.

He didn’t have a Grand Mal seizure this morning, but he did have a myoclonic seizure in his right leg and abdomen. It started about 7:30 AM as just a fasiculation, or rhythmic spasm, in his right thigh, but then it gradually expanded to include his whole right leg and then his abdomen by about 9:00 AM. Neurology doctors were just in and plan to do a “routine” EEG and then they will give Drew some Ativan to try and stop the seizure. On a more positive note, he did move his right arm a little bit more about midnight or 1:00 in the morning, but since then he has not moved more. We think he may have become fatigued or the medications may have peaked. Anyway, hoping the seizure medicines can kick in shortly, stop the myoclonic seizure, and maybe we can see him start moving more purposefully again.

1:00 PM: The nurse was finally able to give Drew some Ativan and a bolus of phenobarbital by about 10:45 AM and the myoclonic seizure stopped within 5 minutes. Just now, Grandpa had been sitting with Drew during our Care Conference, and he said Drew was moving his right arm a little bit again — he bent his elbow while he coughed and then straightened it back out. Still not really able to follow commands or move on command.

So we had our fourth Care Conference today just before lunchtime, and we went into it resolutely that no matter what, we wanted them to do all they could to get Drew’s seizures to stop, but we weren’t exactly sure what to expect. Once introductions were made around the little conference room (2 ICU doctors, 3 Neurology doctors, 1 Rheumatology doctor, and 3 social workers, along with our family), the ICU attending welcomed everyone and said, “I believe we wanted to discuss with you where we plan to go next with Drew. Who would like to start?”

The Rheumatology doctor immediately sat up straighter in her chair. “I want to go first this time,” she said. “I told you before that we have more options in mind, and here are two research articles that discuss them. Before we jump into the treatment, thought, we need to talk a little bit first about the thoughts behind the treatment.”

With that the Rheumatology doctor stood and grabbed a dry erase marker and started diagramming an overview of the immune system on the white board.

“Our immune system is basically divided into two parts: the Innate immune cells and the Adaptive immune cells. Since not a lot is known about FIRES, there is a debate among practitioners which part of the immune system is more to blame. All of our treatments up to now have focused on treating the Adaptive immune cells, which are essentially the antibodies and lymphocytes. Auto-immune disorders occur when the Adaptive immune system (antibodies) begin attacking specific tissues and receptors. We feel that the plasmapheresis and IVig were good, but not the complete answer. Drew hasn’t run any fevers for 2 days despite his persistent pneumonia. However, even though those treatments are finished, Drew continues to have seizures.”

“Now we are going to shift our thinking and treat Drew’s FIRES as more of an auto-inflammatory disorder, which focuses on the Innate immune system. Auto-inflammatory disorders are more rare and essentially occur higher up in the immune system’s chain of attack. Where the Adaptive immune system is more specific and precise, the Innate immune system is more general and non-specific. The Auto-inflammatory process may or may not be triggered by a virus or pathogen, but the reaction is an over reaction of white blood cells and their respone is not well-controlled.”

“If you agree, we would like to begin a new treatment today that targets Drew’s FIRES as an auto-inflammatory disorder, and the new medicine is called Anakinra. He will receive the Anakinra for at least 10 days, but we should have an idea if it works within the next 48 to 72 hours. Other FIRES children who have used this medication have seen their seizures drop by 75% to 90%.”

After the gloomy outlook yesterday, we happily agreed to proceed. If the Anakinra doesn’t work, next step would include a form of chemotherapy, but we’re really hoping the Anakinra works. Several FIRES children successfully had their seizures become significantly less frequent with Anakinra and Ketogenic diet, so we’re hoping it will work for Drew as well. We also discussed possibly moving forward with a tracheotomy and PEG (feeding tube surgically inserted through the abdomen). Additionally, we plan to try the Ketogenic diet one more time to see if we can get it to work while he is receiving the Anakinra, and some of his anti-seizure medicines were also adjusted to see if the control could be improved.

4:30 PM: First round of Anakrina injections completed. Four shots in total, and with each shot, he moved his left hand. After the first one, his brother Alex held his hand, and although Drew’s eyes remained closed, he squeezed Alex’s hand with each of the subsequent shots.

Drew and Alex, October 2016

family, FIRES

It All Started With A Fever, Part 13

The Acute Phase: (Im)patiently Waiting

The Social Worker at Primary Children’s Hospital told us that writing in a journal can be therapeutic. Even more, perhaps sharing our journey these past few weeks may help other families with children who suffer from this rare, devastating disease.

Seems like all we have been doing and saying this past week is that we have to wait and see what happens. Drew has been in a medically-induced and/or seizure-induced coma since July 5th. We are so anxious to see him open his eyes and maybe even talk to us, but it has been so very difficult to wait.

President Deiter F. Uchtdorf gave a hallmark address during the April 2010 General Conference entitled, “Continue in Patience.” I appreciate some of his counsel and wisdom as it struck especially close to home this past week. Elder Uchtdorf explained, “Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something and doing all that we can—working, hoping, and exercising faith; bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!” It would be a gross understatement to say that the desires of our hearts have been delayed. I hope our family may have the necessary fortitude to continue through this trial as it will have been 5 weeks this Friday since we brought Drew to the hospital.

ICU Day #34 (Wednesday, August 2nd)

2:30 AM: Drew’s oxygen saturations have been up and down all night, with increased secretions in his lungs. The respiratory therapist is here in the room performing a percussion treatment on Drew’s lungs, which consists of  a hand-held machine that “gently” beats on his rib cage to loosen the phlegm and consolidate the fluids for suctioning. The doctors have ordered these treatments every 4 hours to help keep Drew’s pneumonia from getting worse, and they seem to be helping, but in between the nurses have had to do more suctioning.

5:30 AM: The Radiology Technician just finished using the portable X-ray machine to take another chest X-ray and see how his pneumonia is doing today.

Drew — missionary cousin homecoming.December 2014.

10:00 AM: Neurology and ICU doctors both just finished rounds and they asked us to have a family meeting with the doctors this afternoon to have a plan in place as they start to bring Drew out of sedation. They plan to begin decreasing the Pentobarbital by 1 unit every 4 hours starting at 8:00 tonight. They want to bring him all the way out of sedation again, but gradually, so that they don’t trigger more seizure activity. They also ordered an ultrasound of his abdomen as the chest X-ray this morning showed a pocket of fluid just below his right lung and they want to look at it more closely.

5:45 PM: We just finished our Care Conference with all of Drew’s doctors, except for Rheumatology, but they had talked already with Neurology and were on board. Essentially, the doctors feel that we really cannot go back to the medically-induced coma again as we have pretty much maxed out its impact on Drew’s seizures, and we really need to focus on more of a long-term, management solution. They will finish the plasmapheresis treatments tomorrow and Saturday, and then we will watch how Drew does over the weekend as the Pentobarbital comes out of his system. The Neurology doctors cautioned that best-case scenario is that Drew will only have a few seizures per hour when he first comes out of the coma. We again assured them that we plan to see this through even though the doctors feel Drew will not come out of this “unscathed” and we really have no idea how much this syndrome will impact him, but we will just have to wait and see.

8:00 PM: The nurse just lowered the Pentobarbital rate from 6 to 5, and the slow process begins to bring Drew out of the medically-induced coma.

One of the biggest challenges for Drew’s siblings is being able to figure out why Heavenly Father would allow this to happen to Drew. As we sit and talk, I have tried to reassure them that one day we will know. Elder Uchtdorf said it better: “Often the deep valleys of our present will be understood only by looking back on them from the mountains of our future experience. Often we can’t see the Lord’s hand in our lives until long after trials have passed.” Again, it is difficult to answer the why questions when we are still in the middle of the trial, but someday we will understand.

ICU Day #35 (Thursday, August 3rd)

12:10 AM: The nurse lowered his Pentobarbital rate from 5 to 4, and the Respiratory Therapy has been in to Drew’s room a couple of times to perform some percussion treatment and suctioning. Drew’s pneumonia has not worsened, but has improved slightly. Still no fevers.

8:15 AM: The nurse just lowered Drew’s Pentobarbital rate from 3 to 2, so at this rate, the Pentobarbital should be shut off by about 4:00 this afternoon. However, because it takes a long time to metabolize the Pentobarbital, the doctors said it will likely take 48 to 72 hours to be completely out of his system and Drew probably won’t be able to “wake up” until Saturday or Sunday. We’re cautiously hopeful, but last time they brought him out of the medically-induced coma, Drew eventually went into status epilepticus, which means the seizures wouldn’t stop and couldn’t be controlled, so we’re very worried again about what will happen. His EEG is definitely more active now as they have already started bringing him out of the sedation, but no clinical seizure activity yet. His lungs are sounding a little bit better. No bowel sounds yet, but hopefully as the Pentobarbital continues to decrease his stomach will wake back up.

10:45 AM: Neurology doctors just stopped by. We looked at the EEG screen, and although he cautioned not to watch it too closely but look more at Drew, he said he was somewhat encouraged. There are still frequent “spikes” but also some normal-looking activity in between. Between coming out of sedation and the constipation, he thought the EEG was encouraging despite the several “spikes.” They will be really curious to see what it looks like after the plasmapheresis today. The plan to increase his Perampanel dose today (it is not full dose yet) and they also discussed with Dr. Folloux other contingency plans last night to adjust some of his other medications as needed. They actually thought of two other medications they could add, and they discussed trying the Ketogenic diet again. His tube feeds have been on hold the past 4 days until his bowels start moving again, but his gut has been completely shut down due to the effects of the Pentobarbital. However, the doctors are hopeful his stomach will wake up by tomorrow or Saturday as they bring him out of sedation.

7:00 PM: The nurse just shut off the Pentobarbital drip. They actually kept him on it a few hours more than they originally discussed due to the plasmapheresis taking off his seizure medications. The kidney doctors performed the plasmapheresis from 1:00 to 3:00 this afternoon, and during the second hour, he started having what appeared to be seizures with much more EEG activity. They believe the plasmapheresis pulled off much of his seizure medication along with his antibodies. So as soon as the plasmapheresis ended, they gave him a new dose of his three seizure medications, plus they added a dose of phenobarbital. It took a couple of hours for the new dose of seizure medications to take effect, and in the meantime, it looked like he had a few seizures, which was really hard to watch and sit and wait for medicines to kick in.

10:00 PM: The ICU doctors just said the Neurology doctor (Dr. Butterfield) called and said to give Drew another bolus of phenobarbital. They ran some lab tests to check his phenobarbital level right now after the first bolus it was only 36 and they want him to be between 40 and 50. So they gave him another bolus just now.

As Elder Uchtdorf concluded his remarks, he summarized:”The work of patience boils down to this: Keep the Commandments; Trust in God, our Heavenly Father; Serve Him with meekness and Christlike love; Exercise faith and hope in the Savior; And NEVER GIVE UP.” We would never give up on Drew, but it sure can be painfully hard to learn patience as we wait.

ICU Day #36 (Friday, August 4th)

8:30 AM: Finally, some success with Drew’s stomach waking up. Last time he came out of the Pentobarbital sedation, it took about 15 hours for him to have a bowel movement. This time the plasmapheresis may have sped it up a little bit because it only took 12 hours. Right after shift change this morning, the day nurse discovered during his assessment that Drew’s stomach is officially awake.

Other developments overnight include the slow, but continued improvement with Drew’s EEG as he continues coming out of the coma. However, this morning some of his brain waves were looking really weird on the EEG — the waves did not look like any of his previous seizures, but there were some definite changes. After talking with the Neurology resident, it appears the EEG is picking up muscle movement, not a seizure. As the sedation continues to wear off, Drew has begun swallowing a little bit. When I first saw him swallowing, I was kind of freaking out because I was afraid it was a seizure, but his swallowing is sporadic, not rhythmic or cyclical, and definitely seems more like swallowing. He also has had a little coughing and belly twitches, a teeny bit of a finger twitch as they were suctioning him this morning. Doctors say some of his reflexes have returned, but not able to follow commands just yet. They believe it will still be another 24 to 48 hours before the Pentobarbital may be out of his system enough for him to possibly “wake up.” Again, we’ll just have to wait and see.

11:30 AM: Dawn just arrived at the hospital, and she has been crying. She had registered Ashley for 11th grade at Copper Hills High School this morning, but she didn’t register Drew for his senior year yet. She is not even sure if, or when, he will be good enough to return to school. His ability to return to school this year will depend largely on his progress the next few days, so we will probably have to go into the school next week and talk to his counselor about options for Drew. Again, we just have to wait and wait and wait and see what happens.

One of the many reasons that the Harry Potter books were so popular and enedearing is that J.K. Rowling provided many outstanding, inspirational quotes throughout all seven books in the series. In the fourth book, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, in the very last chapter of the book (didn’t see this in the movie), Hagrid is talking with Harry and his friends about the coming challenges now that the evil Lord Voldemort has returned. As they prepare to depart school and return home for summer vacation, Hagrid gives them this piece of advice:

“No good sittin’ worryin’ abou’ it,” he said. “What’s comin’ will come, an’ we’ll meet it when it does.”

Although Hagrid does not have the eloquence of Professor Dumbledore, he speaks with the wisdom of one who has undergone his own trials and hardships. Hagrid knows that the most terrible things in life can never be predicted, but at the same time, he also acknowledges that life will still go on, and we must continue forward and be ready for whatever may come our way. No matter how Drew emerges from this illness, we too must press forward and meet what’s comin’ when it gets here.

After eating a lot of food samples at Costco, sometimes you just need a nap.

family, FIRES